Parenting Under PressureSample

Keeping Up With …

When I was a kid, birthday goodie bags were filled with a few pieces of candy and some crayons. Things are different today.

This became clear when I brought my son to one of his friend’s birthday parties. Piled on a table by the door were a dozen large bags containing favors for the guests. Inside my son’s bag were several large candy bars, a puzzle, and the very same toy that we had brought as a gift.

I wanted to crawl into a hole and pretend the party never happened. Unfortunately, images, videos, and commentary of the party continued to circulate on social media for the next week. Each post served as a reminder of my social faux pas and made me think about how I would handle my own son’s birthday.

Parents today often feel pressure to match the standard set at the last party their child attended, even if that means renting a bouncy house, hiring performers, and providing the entire third-grade class with Oscar-worthy swag bags.

While part of this comes from a natural desire to give our children good gifts, not all of our motives are pure. Sometimes we’re just as motivated by competition, pride, and envy. Our kids would be okay with less, but we want to prove to ourselves, and anyone watching, that we are good parents.

Exodus 20:17 commands us not to want “anything” that is our neighbor’s. When we read this, our minds might automatically think about our neighbor’s house or car, but this verse is broader than that. It also includes their lifestyle.

Do you ever feel pressure to spend more on your kids than you should in order to keep up appearances? Do you long to live your neighbor’s lifestyle?

Parents will always want to give their kids good gifts. But what if there were another gift that you could give? A gift that would last far beyond their childhood years? One that would help them avoid the traps of comparisons later in life? 

Contentment is such a gift, but before we can teach it to our children, we must learn it ourselves.

Pray that God teaches you to live within your means and to be satisfied with what you have. Ask Him to show you how to teach your children to value contentment as well.

 For more help on contentment read, “The Grand Illusion” on FamilyLife.com.