Discipling Teens Through Doubt, Culture, Sex, Identity, & PurposeSample

SEX

“We need to have a broader conversation about sexuality because the world is having a broader and more consistent conversation.”

—Dr. Juli Slattery, Axis ParentingTeensSummit.com interview

Sex: The one thing the world never stops talking about….and the one thing Christians seem terrified to talk about.

It’s complicated with things like gender, marriage, divorce, and sexual preferences at the forefront of the conversation. Though God’s Word has plenty to say about sex and sexuality, much of it has come under attack or seems irrelevant and outdated.

But before we ever begin tackling specific issues, our theology of sexuality—the broader picture—must first be established on firm, biblical ground. Without it, everything God says and commands concerning sexuality will seem legalistic, judgmental, and unfair.

Today’s Scripture highlights just one of God’s commands regarding sexual relations between a man and his wife: that we should yield our bodies to our spouses. In addition, Song of Solomon contains another command: that love should not be awakened “until it pleases.” It’s repeated three times (2:7; 3:5; 8:4), demonstrating God’s desire that we wait until the proper time and context to give into our sexual urges.

However, according to current culture, both commands are restrictive, keeping us from sexual freedom and expression.

So did God command these things because He hates pleasure and wants to restrict us? Absolutely not! God is the inventor of sex—He gave it to us as a gift because He is good! Instead, He gives us guidelines and boundaries for sex because He knows that when we stay within those boundaries, we flourish. He also knows that going outside those boundaries only leads to dysfunction, pain, and emptiness (2 Pet 1:3-4).

Once we grasp that concept, the love behind God’s commands becomes abundantly evident. And with that love as the lens, we can begin reclaiming our hearts and minds through what Dr. Slattery calls in her ParentingTeensSummit.com interview “sexual discipleship.”

Discuss as a family:

• (Older kids) How do your friends talk about sex? Does it seem more exciting than how the Bible talks about sex? Why/why not?
• (Younger kids) Why does God give us commands? Does it feel loving for Him to do so? Why/why not?

Dig Deeper: Click here to hear Dr. Slattery’s vision for sexual discipleship and at what age she thinks parents should start talking with their children about sex.