Taming Our TongueSample

Learning to Listen

Yesterday, we looked at what it might look like to make Jesus the Lord of our words - our ultimate source for every word that comes from our mouths.

Today, we will consider the role that learning to listen plays in our pursuit of taming our tongue.

Catherine Doherty once wrote these profound words on the topic of learning to listen, "For when we listen to one another we must be totally surrendered to the person, totally attentive to his (or her) speech. Also, we must be totally dependent on God for our replies."

Looking closer at her words, we see three aspects of listening that provide a framework for taming our tongues as we engage in conversation with others in daily life.

First, "we must be totally surrendered to the person." A surrendered heart begins in prayer long before we enter into conversation with others. In conversation, we practice humility, laying down our pride and our natural desire to control the flow of the conversation. We practice the words of James 1:19, which says, "You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger." And Proverbs 17:27-28 offers similar guidance, "One who spares words is knowledgeable; one who is cool in spirit has understanding. Even fools who keep silent are considered wise; when they close their lips, they are deemed intelligent."

Second, a surrendered heart opens the door to being "totally attentive" to the words of others. In today's world that is obsessed with accomplishment and accumulation, what a rare gift it is to offer our full attention to another person. Offering our full attention begins with recognizing that the person sitting in front of us is made in the image of God and has great worth and value in His eyes. (See Genesis 1:27) When we see others through God's eyes, the Holy Spirit fills us with the fruit of patience, enabling us to give the gift of our time. The fruit of patience creates the necessary space for others to be fully heard in our presence.

Last, when it is time to speak, we are to be "totally dependent on God for our replies." If we are willing to slow down, realizing the importance of each word we say, the Holy Spirit will fill our mouths with words covered in love and truth. Words that will bring life and not death. Life-giving words that will be delivered at the right time, with the right tone, and with the right intention. And these words will open up another soul to the healing power of Christ.

Today, take time to get quiet before the Lord. In the stillness, ask Him, "Lord, Jesus, form me into your image that I might learn to be the kind of person who listens well. Let the words that I speak come from You in order that they might be covered in love and truth."