When Conflict Arises - Biblical Wisdom for Managing DifferencesSample

Seek Reconciliation

If you've been married for any time, you have discovered that conflict is an inevitable part of relationships. Conflicts can spring up in your marriage, friendships, or your workplace due to differences, misunderstandings, or, unfortunately, even personal attacks. As followers of Christ, we are to approach conflict with wisdom, grace, and, most importantly, a desire for reconciliation. But how do you navigate conflicts, especially in your marriage, in a way that most honor God?

The Bible gives us a great place to start when it teaches us the importance of seeking reconciliation and peace with others. Jesus instructs us in Matthew 5:23-24 to reconcile with our brother or sister before offering our gifts to God. Therefore, restoring relationships should be a priority, and I suggest even more so if that relationship is your marriage.

When my husband and I were first married, and conflict arose, seeking reconciliation was not my top priority as much as convincing him I was right was. I instinctively put up walls and defenses at the threat of any conflict, which was the opposite of reconciling or seeking peace. The more I grew in the Lord and began to apply scripture in our disputes, the more we learned to find resolutions together. One of the benefits of doing things God's way is that it works!

There are occasions when reconciling doesn't come easy or resolutions are hard to find, but God reminds us in Romans 12:18 that as far as it depends on us, we are to live at peace with everyone. This verse means that as followers of Christ, we are to do our part and let God worry about the rest. So even in your worst conflicts, when you allow God to do His part, you can still find peace.

Lastly, it's important to remember that not all conflict is destructive. Conflict is the very thing that makes reconciling possible. Conflict teaches us humility, allows us to grow, and will enable us to move beyond our differences and still love one another despite them, which is an excellent thing in your marriage.

Ponder This:

What has been your priority when it comes to conflict? Is it reconciliation or being right?

Let's Pray:

Dear Lord,

You are the greatest reconciler there is and will ever be. While we were still sinners, you died for us to reconcile us to you. Help us to have the same heart for reconciling with one another that you have for us. In Jesus' name, Amen.