10 Steps to Unity in Your Blended FamilySample

Step 5: Pray God’s blessings over your ex-spouse.

Are you actively praying for your ex-spouse? That may be one of the wildest suggestions you have ever heard. Prayer is our weapon against Satan and his plan to create havoc and disunity in our lives. Praying for our ex-spouse may be difficult if we are harboring anger and bitterness toward them. Jesus emphasized the importance of forgiving others, indicating a direct relationship between God’s forgiveness and our forgiving others as His disciples. We are His disciples and are called to live in accordance with His will, not our will or emotions. One way we mirror the heart of God is to forgive others– even our ex.

When we have feelings of anger and resentment towards someone, the best solution is to pray that God would reveal the condition of our hearts in the matter. As we ask God to work in our hearts and heal those broken and wounded places, we can also begin praying for the other person's heart and their healing. This may not feel natural. Continue to place yourself in God’s presence. The more you experience God’s love and forgiveness for you, the more God can soften your heart toward your ex. Eventually, you will be able to pray God’s blessings over their life, marriage, family, finances, health, and whatever you sense the Lord is leading you to pray. It is tough to stay angry at someone when you are actively praying blessings on them. This is not only for their good but yours as well. Watch how your heart, mind, and attitude toward them will change over time, and see how God will work in their lives.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I thank You for my ex-spouse and the person You created them to be. I know You love them unconditionally and infinitely. I pray Your blessings of health, finances, holiness, and favor over them today. Forgive me for my feelings of ________ toward them. I ask that You would heal and cleanse any area of my heart that is wounded and impure. Help my ex-spouse and me to soften our hearts toward one another and carry your peace, patience, mercy, and grace into our co-parenting relationship. Help me to see my ex-spouse as You do. I want Your love for them to rule in my heart. Amen.