Into the Deep: Going Beyond AnxietySample

Fear of Death

When we were children and afraid of the dark, many of us were paralyzed by fear and would only draw the covers tighter around our toes and necks. Still more of us imagined that the shadowy shapes in our rooms were monsters. But many of us in time learned that the best way to dispel anxiety about monsters in our room or under our bed was to turn the light on (possibly with a caring parent) and make sure that there was nothing to be afraid of after all. Those shapes? A pile of clothes. A chair. In many ways, the fear of death traps us like a child trapped in terror by the shadowy shapes in their room. We become locked in our blankets, allowing our imaginations to rule what by light is not so scary after all. Many people I work with experience greater anxiety in avoiding the difficult parts of their lives than if they had faced the difficult things head-on.

Death is like the darkness of our room. When we behold it in safer moments—with the lights on and loved ones holding our hands—it feels less scary. But when the lights are off and we aren’t so sure, we start guessing about the contents of that darkness.

It is sobering to think that the goodness of our lives will end and that we may not experience everything we had hoped to on this side of death. Death brings with it the certainty that we will all have unfinished business, whether it is with our relationships, our hopes of achievement, or our quest to find some rest. And so, we often distract ourselves from grief by seeking out busyness, or self-importance, or by attempting to sate our endless appetites for experiences or material things.

Yet the resurrection of Jesus is more than just the conquering of death. It is also the conquering of the fear of death that may push us towards unfulfilling or even destructive choices. In this way, the resurrection speaks to our fear in the present and grants us peace because we need not fear that our lives will end too soon, as in Christ there is always yet more life to be lived. If we let it, the resurrection is like the room light that reveals the folly of our fear and opens the door for contentment both in this life and the next.

1. How did Jesus respond to Martha and Mary’s grief and fear? Does his response connect with any of the grief or fear you may be carrying?
2. If you have encountered death, in what ways did it change the way you lived your life?