Happily Ever After: Devotions from Time of GraceSample

When You’ve Been Married a While: See Your Spouse as God’s Gift

We live in the age of the consumer. Our fickle buying habits drive companies to pamper us with better and better products and better and better service. Every year hotels get better, cars more luxurious, and computers faster. Every year cable TV brings more channels, Wal-Mart offers an even broader array of stuff, and there are even more types of coffees to order from your local barista.

If you look at your spouse with consumer eyes, you will soon be disappointed. This year’s model may look a lot like last year’s, definitely showing some wear. There is no money-back guarantee. There is no customer service department. There is no one you can sue.

So then don’t look at your spouse with consumer eyes. Look with the eyes of faith, seen through the lens of God’s Word. “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD” (Proverbs 18:22). Get it? Your God who loves you is blessing you by letting you be married--it’s a sign of his favor, not a desire to torture you.

You can spend your time itemizing the ways in which your spouse falls short. Or--you could take inventory of all the good qualities your spouse does have. That very attitude makes everything better. If your spouse feels judged and inadequate, he may just give up and live down to your low expectations. But if she feels appreciated, she will strive to live up to your words of praise.