Becoming Like Jesus: Confession and RepentanceSample

How To Own Up When You Mess Up

We’ve spent this week talking all about what sin is, why it matters that we don’t let sin fester in the dark, and how to embrace God’s grace. Hopefully, you’ve been inviting God to speak to you and show you things that you need to confess and bring into the light.

Today, we are going to get really practical about how to confess well and how to lovingly receive someone else’s confession when they bring it to you.

Ready? Let’s dive in.

Pray…

Heavenly Father, thank you for your grace in my life. Jesus, help me reflect that grace to others today. Holy Spirit, please keep showing me the parts of my heart that need to be brought into the light and give me the courage to confess, repent, and receive your mercy. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Read…

“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye. Matthew 7:3-5 NLT

“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets. Matthew 7:12 NLT

Consider….

This passage comes from one of Jesus’ most famous teachings—the Sermon on the Mount. In this conversation, Jesus tells us what His Kingdom is like and how to experience the Kingdom way of life, here and now. Here are a couple principles Jesus teaches about what confession looks like that we can apply today:

1. We look in the mirror before we point a finger.

When Jesus is talking about specks and logs, He’s reminding us of our human tendency to downplay our own faults and exaggerate the mistakes of others. That tendency is a symptom of sin. Sin is the disease of self-centeredness that blinds us to the image of God in ourselves and others. Said another way, when sin is present, our vision gets blurry. Step one to owning up when we mess up is getting brutally honest with ourselves. Acknowledge the thing you don’t want to acknowledge and call it what it is—sin. When we do that, there is a clear pathway for dealing with it.

2. We bring our sin out of the dark and into the light.

After we get brutally honest with ourselves, we get brutally honest with others. When we do, we say it like it is. We don’t sugarcoat the sin, because the truth is, it’s ugly. Remember, confession is agreeing with God. We say the same thing that God would say about the thing. If you need help finding the words to get out what you need to get out, start with Scripture. Probably sounds weird, but the Bible actually has a lot to say about our selfish desires and the lifestyles they lead to. Maybe your confession will start off something like this: “I’ve been reading the Bible and Galatians 5 says that when we follow our selfish desires, the results are really clear. I realized that I have been doing that because I’ve definitely been allowing impure thoughts in my mind.” Then, you do the really scary thing and you say those impure thoughts out loud.

It will be hard and it will be humbling, but it will bring healing.

3. We lead with compassion, not condemnation.

What can we do if we are on the receiving end of a confession like that? We do what we would want them to do for us. We do what Jesus has already done for us. We offer compassion. One of the most powerful things we can do as followers of Jesus is show mercy to others. Why? In a culture that says, “Get even,” showing mercy is revolutionary. As the Body of Christ, the way we deal with sin should look like Christ! If Jesus didn’t come into the world to condemn the world (that means judge it harshly), then why do we so often judge others harshly instead of loving them? This doesn't mean we excuse sin and say it’s no big deal. It means we respond to them the way we would someone to respond to us. With love, grace, mercy, and compassion.

Practice…

Who do you need to get brutally honest with?

Maybe you’ve been doing this Plan all week and each day you read, it’s getting harder and harder to ignore that thing that keeps popping into your mind. That habit that you haven’t labeled as a sin yet, that prompting to tell someone the secret that you have held onto for so long. Today is the day to act. Seriously, text someone you trust right now and ask if you can have a conversation with them in person.

Owning up when we mess up is not easy. It will be hard and it will be humbling, but it will bring healing.

Listen…

Find a quiet place where you can continue to spend time with God. Maybe you have a favorite chair, a certain spot in your backyard, or a particularly cozy closet. Wherever you need to go to limit distractions, do it.

Set a timer for five minutes.

Ask God to speak to you.

When you get distracted in your mind, and you will, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, use it as an opportunity to come back to Jesus by praying this prayer:

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. Psalm 139:23-24 NLT

When the timer ends, thank God for the time you spent together and go into your day looking for opportunities to love Him and love others.