A More Beautiful LifeSample

Heart in Action

When people ask me how I came up with HEART, I usually tell them I didn’t come up with it. I uncovered it. It feels like something bigger than me, a collective effort between Jesus, a Jewish psychologist, and every person who’s ever wanted a better life than she has now.

When I set out to rebalance my life, I thought I was creating a new way to set goals. Like so many of you, I aspired to a life I could never quite achieve. Something was always holding me back. Frustrated by my lack of progress and desperate to grasp a life out of reach, I was afraid to hope life might ever be beautiful again.

I don’t feel that way anymore. In Jeremiah 29:11 God tells us, “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”

Remember that terrible day I told you about? The day I found out the business was bankrupt?

For a long time, that memory stung. I’d done everything the way I’d been told and taught and still ended up Mayor of Failure City. The first time I even considered setting goals again, I cringed, cried, and tried to find somewhere to hide. Harbored resentment accumulated in my heart, as I watched others achieve goals I had set and tried to achieve. I thought I was angry at my goals, but really I was just angry at anybody who looked like they had a life more beautiful than mine.

There were multiple points of failure, of course. But I felt most betrayed by and disappointed in my goals, ambitions, hopes, and dreams. I questioned everything I had ever hoped for or dreamed about.

What was the point of hoping for a better future, or dreaming big dreams, if no matter how hard I worked, I ended up here?

Despite the disappointment in my dreams, a deep internal desire for a better, or at least less chaotic, life remained. I didn’t need the best—good or better would suffice. I was tired of trying to be the best only to end up in the most awful, shameful place I could imagine. The longing for something restored, however vague it was, kept me going.

At that juncture, as with all crossroads, I had several choices. I could rage, defiantly refuse to set goals, declaring they just didn’t work for me. Or I could take ownership of my story—all the good and bad and gory and glorious parts of it. I could learn as much as possible about myself, understand my wiring and brain and intrinsic motivators, understand how God created me and the vision He wanted for my life, and try this goal-setting thing again, but differently.

I chose the latter.

After three years of HEART, the ambitions and goals I’d been so nervous to embrace showed up again. Not because I forced them—not because I arbitrarily made them by comparing my life to someone who I liked more than I liked myself. But they started coming from a deep, steady, balanced, beautiful place called my own heart.

The biggest change I’ve seen in my own life—and my hope for you—is the introduction of grace into my life. “The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus” (1 Timothy 1:14). I no longer see myself as behind or beat myself up for not being Superwoman. I don’t shame myself, or when I do, it’s only for a moment. Then I remind myself I’m doing the best I can. I show up for myself and, because of that, I show up for other people. I find joy in doing the dishes, riding bikes with the kids, waiting in line, and reading a book. There’s beauty in everything, if only we stop to notice it: a crazy, messy, beautiful life.

Respond

Have you experienced the grace of Jesus? Briefly describe how it felt.

List names of people you know who need to hear about the saving grace of Jesus. How can you help make that happen?

Prayer

Glorious Savior, lead me to someone today who needs to hear about the saving grace You offer!