Following Christ's CharacterSample

LOVE AND FORGIVENESS

INTRODUCTION

It’s not always easy to love other people, yet Jesus said this is one of God’s two most important commandments (Matthew 22:37-38). “Love your neighbor as yourself” is the second great commandment of Jesus. It immediately follows His commandment to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.”

Who is your neighbor? The parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:30-37) taught us that our neighbors are those who are not just close to us but can even be a complete stranger. We are neighbors to others when we are helping them in times of need unconditionally.

Loving your neighbors as yourself is not easy, and it can be even more difficult to forgive people, especially those who have hurt you deeply. But you can never love without forgiving.  The bible teaches us in 1 Peter 4:8, “And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

Christ’s greatest act of love was the unconditional forgiveness of all our trespasses when He voluntary died on the cross (Colossians 2:13-15). Apostle Paul says in Ephesians 4:32 that we are to “be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

SHARING

What are the 3 attributes of a Christian who loves and forgives others unconditionally? Read Ephesians 4:25-32 (NIV).

1. Speak the Right Things (verse 25)

One of the greatest moral issues that we all struggle with is that of telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. We bend the truth in many ways. There is the half-truth. You sort of tell the truth, but not the whole truth. You tell your employer, “I wasn’t feeling well,” which was sort of true. But, in reality, you were not so ill as to miss work. You just wanted to do something else. Or, there is the white lie, a supposedly “innocent” lie that doesn’t hurt anyone. “Yes, your new hair cut is beautiful!” 

Truth is not just about conformity with fact or reality. In the Bible, truth is about conformity to God’s standards as revealed in His Word (John 17:17).  In verse 25, Apostle Paul is saying that we who have experienced the new birth, must lay aside falsehood, and speak the truth because we are members of one another.

Truthfulness is important to God because He is the God of truth who hates lying and falsehood. Proverbs 12:22 states, “The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy.” Be truthful at all times and even if it may hurt the person’s feelings, pray and seek God’s wisdom on how to share it with the person. If you need more help, you may seek a pastor or an elder for godly advise. It is important for us to seek godly advise as the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy (James 3:17). When we involve God in our relationships, He will help us to mend it back because our God is a God of peace. (Ephesians 2:14-16)

2. Have the Right Attitude (verses 26-27)

Paul said in verses 26-27, “In your anger do not sin” :Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” 

Paul does not mean that Christians should be characterized by anger, but our anger should be controlled. Uncontrolled can anger quickly leads to doing wrong. In fact, Paul taught us to make peace before the next day! 

The Bible teaches us in Romans 12:18, that as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men. It is a matter of the attitude of the heart.  We may struggle in our flesh but as we surrender to God and get brethren in Christ accountable for our actions, we will soon be able to change. One of the fruit of the Spirit is meekness and the Greek word for it called “praotēs” which means strength under control. The more we allow God (though the leading of the Holy Spirit) to work in us, the more we become more Christ like each day.

Believers should not to let time go by before dealing with anger. We ought to deal with anger as a priority. Otherwise, bitterness or the desire for vengeance can grow, leading to more sinful thoughts and actions. Anger can be a helpful emotion, yet must be handled carefully and quickly to avoid leading to sin. Do not be afraid to seek help from the church elders for support and guidance. 

3. Do the Right Things (verses 28-29)

When we think about something, we do we often think about it in terms of our own wants and needs. We think about food on our tables, homes to live in, cars to drive, entertainment to be had, and new possessions to buy. Paul mentioned in verse 28 that “Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need.” All believers who were once used to steal must stop stealing by putting off the old self and putting on the new self. As believers, we need to learn to put on the new man by meditating the Word of God and internalizing it (think how to change) by allowing the Holy Spirit to lead us to change us.  The Bible tells us in 2 Corinthians 4:16, “although our outer man is decaying but our inner man is being renewed day by day.” This happens only when we involve the Holy Spirit in our lives.

Paul continued to say in verse 29 that “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” It is important that we recognize that there is a way of speaking (e.g. gossip, slander, negative criticism, lewd talk) which does great harm. The Bible teaches us that we need to control our tongue.  (James 3:1-12) Words have power to destroy reputations, to discourage, and to break the hearts of people.  Let us as believers learn to speak to one another in ways which encourages, build up and display the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ.

CLOSING

If not for love, there would be no reason at all for a perfect God to sacrifice His own Son to redeem an undeserving and broken world. If not for love, there would be no forgiveness for the world. Love is needed in order to truly forgive somebody. We cannot truly forgive somebody if we cannot love them. We are called to do both, not just one or the other.

DISCUSSION

• Share how we can be truthful even in difficult situation. 

• Share how you deal with anger.

• How do you forgive someone which hurt you so badly?