Andy Mineo: Living With DoubtSample

Day 2: The Doubt of Self (Pt. 1)

“You (doubt) fly circles around my head, while I sit on the edge of my bed. I cry out ‘What have I done again?’ it’s hard not to hate who I am.” - Andy Mineo, “Shame” (off of II: The Arrow)

Life has a way of humbling us through an inescapable event that we must all face: failure. Failing, or the fear of failing, is often the source of our self-doubt.

When I fail in my pursuits and goals, it is so easy to doubt myself and my abilities. When I fail to be obedient to God, it is hard not to doubt that I am loved. 

But God initiates a relationship with us fully aware of our flaws. He asks us to follow him even knowing we will fail Him.

One day my brother asked me, “Do you think God can really forgive us after all the mistakes we’ve made? I don’t get why He would continue to love us.” My brother has two daughters, my nieces. I asked him, “Mark, if your daughters grew up and went into the world and made a mess of their lives, disobeyed what you taught them, and did things that broke your heart and hurt you—would you ever stop loving them? Would you ever stop being their father?” He told me “Of course not! No matter what they did, I would love them. They’re my children!” This is the story of the prodigal son!

I pray that we would more often see ourselves the way God sees us—valuable and loved—before we do anything right and even after we mess it all up! As children of a patient and loving father.

Failure is an event—not an identity.

Our self-doubt can be crippling. The remedy is not to convince ourselves of our own greatness. The remedy is seeing that God is so great, our flaws and failures cannot outweigh His power and love. 

Prayer: God, may failure never cause me to doubt my ability, but teach me where I must grow. And may my failure in obedience never cause me to doubt Your love for me, but remind me how great it really is. Amen.