The 5 Love Languages For Him Reading PlanSample

Some of the best opportunities in life involve risk—the very real possibility of rejection, embarrassment, or failure. It takes a lot of courage to roll the dice and face the possible consequences. Those who choose to pursue those opportunities usually face no shortage of discouragers—people inclined to rain on their parade and argue that something can’t be done or shouldn’t be tried. These doom-and-gloom promoters can be pretty persuasive, especially if there’s no one to counter their influence.

Cue the encouraging spouse.

Your wife likely has untapped potential in one or more areas of life. That potential may be awaiting your encouraging words. Perhaps she needs to enroll in a course to develop that potential. Maybe she needs to meet some people who have succeeded in that area and can give her insight on the next step she needs to take. Your words may give your wife the courage necessary to take that first step.

Let’s be clear: I’m not talking about pressuring your wife to do something that you want. I’m talking about encouraging her to develop an interest that she already has. A certain well-meaning husband may be tempted to pressure his wife to look for a more lucrative job. He may think he’s encouraging her, but unless that’s what she wants too, his words will sound more like condemnation to her. If she has the desire and motivation to seek a better position, her husband’s words will bolster her resolve. If not, his words will come across as judgmental and guilt inducing. They will express not love but rejection.

If, however, she says, “You know, I’ve been thinking about starting a catering business on the side,” then he has the opportunity to give words of encouragement (“If you decide to do that, I can tell you one thing: you’ll be a success. That’s one of the things I love about you. When you set your mind to something, you do it. If that’s what you want to do, I’ll certainly do everything I can to help you”). Such words may give her the courage to start drawing up a list of potential clients.

Encouragement requires empathy—seeing the world from your wife’s perspective. We must first learn what is important to our wives. Only then can we give encouragement. With verbal encouragement, we’re trying to communicate, “I know. I care. I’m with you. How can I help?” We’re trying to show that we believe in her and in her abilities. We’re giving credit and praise.

Most of us have more potential than we’ll ever develop. What holds us back is often a lack of courage. A loving spouse can supply that all-important catalyst.