Profound Mystery: Marriage Lessons From EphesiansSample

Forgive Each Other

The first fight I can remember with my wife was over a misplaced pair of tickets to a New York Mets baseball game. I’m generally the more forgetful member of the family, so it shouldn’t have come as a shock to me that my wife would accuse me of misplacing them. But this time I wasn’t having it. I felt disrespected, and my normally easygoing manner went into hiding along with the tickets.

“What? Is your memory perfect?” I said. “How do you know that you didn’t lose them? Why do you assume that this is my fault?” 

Before long, the fun afternoon we had planned began to unravel. 

Marriage can be wonderful, but when two flawed individuals commit to a lifetime together, it will get messy. How we respond to those moments will make all the difference.

In Ephesians, Paul was speaking to a group of people who had come to realize that their best efforts to please God were not good enough. They understood their sinfulness had earned them a ticket to hell, but God loved them enough to send Jesus to absorb the penalty for that sin. When they accepted Jesus’ sacrifice on their behalf and allowed Him to be in charge of their lives, they were forgiven. He wanted them to remember what God had done for them, because forgiven people forgive people.

If we can understand the depths of forgiveness that God has offered us, and accept that gift, then it becomes much easier to forgive others and live with tenderheartedness.

After a frantic search around the house, we eventually found the tickets. As it turned out, I was the one who had misplaced them! At that point, my wife had a choice. She could let our fight ruin the afternoon, or she could remember the forgiveness that Christ had given her and offer that same forgiveness to me. She chose the latter.

How she was able to just let it go was a mystery to me, but she did. I don’t remember who won the game that day, but I do remember this: On that day, we both won.

Pray:

Jesus, thank You for Your forgiveness. I know I don’t deserve it. Please help me to see my spouse through the lens of Your sacrifice and be kind, forgiving, and tenderhearted. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

For more on forgiveness read, “What It Means to Forgive” by Winston T. Smith on FamilyLife.com.