Building Character in Your ChildSample

Courage

By Carlos Santiago

Fear is debilitating. It can come without warning, seizing the heart, and paralyzing the soul. Rational or irrational, fear can make even the bravest of us cower like babies. Knowing this, I should have been more understanding when my little son began to demonstrate an intense fear of the toilet. 

Unfortunately, my first reaction was annoyance. It didn’t matter what time of day it was, or if every light in the house was on, our son wanted a personal escort to the bathroom.  

To make matters worse, he wanted one of us to stand guard at the door and wait until he finished. No amount of yelling or threatening was enough to motivate him to go alone. I think he was convinced there were gremlins there waiting to eat him.

After many long fruitless battles, I began to realize that his desire to have me with him, although inconvenient, was actually a good thing. It meant he trusted me to keep him safe. My presence gave him courage. So, I became his escort. I’d sit on the floor on the other side of the door and wait. For longer guard duty assignments, I made sure to have my kindle with me.

It eventually dawned on me that this is precisely what God does for us. When we put our trust in Him, He walks with us through the darkest moments of our lives. He offers us strength, comfort, and peace. Our situations may not change, but with Him at our side we can agree with the Psalmist who said, “[O]f whom shall I be afraid?” 

When fear strikes your child, the solution is not to try to convince them not to be afraid, but rather to give them something bigger and stronger to trust in. One of the best ways that you can do this is simply let them see where your courage comes from. 

When we moved across country our kids were scared. I wanted to promise that everything would be ok, but the truth was, I was scared too. I didn’t know what the future would hold. But I did know that God loved us and that He was calling us to move. 

So, in an age appropriate way, my wife and I were transparent about our own fears. We let them see us searching the scriptures for comfort. When we found passages that helped, we shared them, and prayed together. 

Over time, our family’s courage to face the unknown grew, but not out of positive thinking or self-confidence. It grew out of trust in the love of the unshakable God we serve. 

To learn more about building courage in your child listen to, Contagious Courage on FamilyLifeToday.com.