Healthy Practices Of Ministry CouplesSample

The Need for Rest
By Brian and Jenni Clayville of Paseo Church

It’s important to observe and partake in rest...a Sabbath. It’s even MORE important to rest together as a couple. This practice is not always encouraged. God recommended it from the beginning of Creation so we would be wise to follow it.

From personal experience, I (Brian) don’t do as well with any area of my life if I’m spiritually, emotionally, and physically exhausted. Honoring the Sabbath provides better clarity of purpose and more intimacy in our relationships. Part of the Sabbath practice should be family vacations and couples vacations away from all chores and weekly routines.

We have not always been consistent in keeping a Sabbath. In fact, I would say the most unhealthy part of our marriage was when we weren't practicing a Sabbath at all. Jenni is the Worship & Creative Arts Pastor at our church which makes me the “Pastor’s Husband.” As a ministry couple, you know it’s difficult because church lands on everyone else’s “sabbath” but for your family, it’s the longest and hardest work day. I work a more typical work week while Jenni leads most of what happens on weekends at church. It’s impossible for Sunday to be her Sabbath so we have to be creative.

Because the weekend is my (Jenni’s) busiest time, I have made Monday my set Sabbath. As a family, we protect our Friday evenings as our Sabbath. This allows us to play games, watch a movie or read together. We do our best to guard full days, half days, and evenings that can be spent in recreation and enjoyment together as a family. Those guarded moments are not for scheduling meetings, taking out the laptop to finish up work, sending emails or answering phone calls. It takes commitment and communication about what is refreshing and life-giving for each other. As we see more and more marriages falling apart, the more we see the importance in keeping the Sabbath.

If you can’t keep the actual “Sabbath”, what day of the week do you set aside for rest? If you don’t have a set day, consider choosing one with your spouse now.

1. What are some guidelines you should set for your Sabbath? (i.e., limited emails, no social media, dinners out, family nights, etc.)