4 TRUTHS YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE GETTING MARRIEDSample

"Great, an argument!"

Husbands, love your wives ... Wives, respect your husbands ... Love and respect are part of the balance of marriage in God's plan.

God takes the time to encourage the husband to love and the wife to respect. This is undoubtedly because respect comes more naturally to the husband than to the wife, and love comes more naturally to the wife than to the husband.

If God takes the time to emphasize the need to learn to love and respect, it means that these notions are not always so obvious to us in marriage.

A healthy couple is not one that never argues! It is a couple that has learned to manage their conflicts fairly, to take advantage of these tense moments to grow in their relationship.

Inevitably, tensions will arise at one time or another. Just as Jesus spoke of two houses that, despite their different foundations, will face the same storm, every couple, whatever their history, will experience conflicts.

The objective is that these do not become destructive. It is not when the storm has already arrived that we need to decide on the rules for managing these tensions. It is essential to be able to talk about them when everything is going well.

Prevention is better than cure! You know each other; you know what you need in these moments to feel heard. Set your rules together!

Only look for "win-win" solutions. This is not easy, but you have to promise each other that you will stay engaged in the discussion as long as either of you does not feel fairly heard and understood.

If you desire to win the argument and be "right" about your spouse, you will both lose! You and your spouse are one emotionally, spiritually, and physically. So, it is impossible to emerge victorious on your own!

The solution is to promise each other to continue the discussion, daily if need be, until you can say, "That's it, we've found the solution and made progress!"

Has this plan helped you? You can go further with Developing a Healthy Marriage .