Teaching the Right Response to Rejection

We can handle a lot of disappointment of our own, but when our kids get rejected, it’s hard to keep the momma/papa bear caged. It can be difficult to understand how someone would overlook the treasure our children are. We see their best, and we like it that way.

And that’s part of our role as parents. The world will point out their faults often enough. They need someone in their corner, championing them. But beyond this, they need someone pointing them to God—their ultimate champion, whose love will never run out.

Stand firm and be deeply rooted in his love. I pray that you and all God’s people will understand what is called wide or long or high or deep. I want you to know all about Christ’s love, although it is too wonderful to be measured. Then your lives will be filled with all that God is.

Ephesians 3:17b–19 (CEV)

Rejections can be crushing, and then refining. Faced rightly, a rejection is a good time for our kids to learn to deal with their emotions, and to turn to God as their anchor. We can help them walk through this process.

Whether it’s not making the team or college, or being told no for the prom, a rejection often marks the death of a relationship or a dream. Our children will need to grieve—but grieve well. We can help them work through all the questions: Why is this so disappointing? Did I do anything wrong? Do I need to make amends or ask for forgiveness? What can I learn from this?

We can also teach them to lament—to take their hurt to the Lord. They can grieve the lost opportunity by going through all the stages of mourning with God. They can be angry at the situation, their powerlessness, and the enemy who delights in making all of life hard.

After a time, they will need to move on. Help them out of the grip of sadness to trust God for hope for the future. Teach them to pray. To sit in the presence of God in all honesty. To hold to Scripture. To glory in God’s gifts—like a sunset. To interrupt negative thoughts spinning in their mind and force themselves to think about the Lord. To take healthy steps such as exercise and rest. To know God’s love, be filled with it, and then overflow with it in helping others.

Keep turning them back to the Lord’s endless love. Their Creator loves his handiwork (that’s them!). He forgives them. He doesn’t stop liking them. He is refining them to be better and better. He has a loving plan for their life. He will always be with them, and for them. Because of him, they can hope for the future and can reach out in love to others. He will help them stand firm in his love.

Pray

Lord, help me and my kids respond rightly to rejection when we’d rather retaliate or retreat. Teach us your ways, and the depths of your love. Amen.

Time to Talk

Conversation starter for kids: Provides you with questions and prompts to facilitate a time of applicable discussion with children to lead them towards knowing God and His Word more deeply.

Question(s): When have you been rejected or told no? What did you learn from it? What things help you feel better when a door is closed for you?

Keep It Going

Related passages: These additional verses will help parents expand Scriptural knowledge and place on the armor of God’s Word to tackle each day. Swipe to read the passages today.

Psalm 13

1 John 4:10

________________________________

Tonia Gutting wrote this devotional for the Hero Squad Program of the American Bible Society. Hero Squad provides complimentary faith-based resources to strengthen and encourage military families through God’s Word. For more information or to enroll your military family, check out our website. www.myherosquad.org.