David and Mical: The Problem of Getting Back With Your ExSample

THE PROBLEM OF GETTING BACK WITH YOUR EX - PART 3

"David also returned home to bless his family; but Mical, Saul's daughter, came out to meet him and said to him, 'How well the king of Israel has looked today, showing himself before the slaves of his servants as a shameless man!" (2 Samuel 6:20 DHHED).

Few passages in the entire Bible have the charge of sarcasm that we find in the text above. But if you keep reading the story, David's response was no less hurtful.

No, Mical was not a bad woman. She was not only the sister of her best friend; twice the Bible states that she "loved David" (1 Samuel 18:20,28). She loved him so much that she saved his life when her father tried to kill him (1 Samuel 19:11-13).

David was not a bad man either. When it fell to him to give her dowry for her, he gave double what he was asked for (1 Samuel 18:27). Despite his questionable motives, retrieving her was practically his first decree as king.

However, they did not know how to leave things in the past. Both had made their lives the way they could; one ended up married to another man at the behest of her father, and the other already had six wives (2 Samuel 3: 2-5). The Bible was silent about David and Mical's relationship for a long time, an example of how relationships built on the wrong foundations seem to last over time; however, they are just an anti-personnel mine waiting to be pressured to explode into a thousand pieces.

I summarize the detonation of this case (although I recommend you read it completely in 2 Samuel 6:20-23) David danced for God without any kind of shame; she criticized how he looked doing it; he responded with painful words and, in my opinion, full of resentment.

The story ends without a happy ending. "And Mical had no children in all her life" (2 Samuel 6:23 DHHED). Her marriage ended up being for diplomatic purposes only.

It doesn't have to be your story. Marriage under God's principles is a source of love, satisfaction, and fulfillment. But when we start out badly and do not fix things, it is a matter of time before it produces wounds that are difficult to heal. Would you pray right now for your relationship? If you don't have one yet, ask God for wisdom to allow you to choose your partner wisely.

Lessons on the side:

• Words are the deadliest weapons in a relationship. When the relationship reaches the levels of physical violence, words have usually destroyed all traces of respect and consideration for the other. As funny as sarcasm sounds, it can in a moment destroy the other person. Avoid questioning your partner's behavior in this way if you are looking for a change in their attitude, or clarification as to why they behave this way.
• As hurtful as your partner's taunts are, responding cruelly will leave wounds in your partner that may never heal. David didn't lie in this case, but he told a resentful, loveless truth. Words like that can overturn the personal perception of someone you say you love.
• If you and your partner have said hurtful and offensive words to each other in your relationship, seek professional help. Healing wounds takes time and requires the follow-up of a professional, both physically and emotionally. Give love a chance by forgiving each other and seeing a therapist.