"40 Days of Love" in American Sign LanguageSample

Don’t Repeat the Hurt. Delete It!
By Rick Warren

“Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your own failings and shortcomings and let them drop.” (Mark 11:25 AMP)

When people hurt us, we have two natural tendencies: remember and retaliate.

But that’s not what 1 Corinthians 13:5 tells us to do: “Love keeps no record of being wronged” (NLT).

So how should you respond to the people who have hurt you? How do you handle all those wounds and hurts you’ve stockpiled in your memory?

You don’t repeat them; you delete them. Let it go. Forgive, and get on with your life.

When we get hurt, we tend to repeat that hurt in three ways: emotionally in our minds, relationally as a weapon, and practically by telling other people.

First, we repeat it by going over and over it in our minds. But resentment is self-destructive. It only perpetuates the pain. It never heals. It never solves anything. Whatever you think about most is what you move toward. If all you think about is how much you’ve been hurt in the past, you’ll only move toward the past. But if you focus on the future, you move toward the future. If you focus on the potential, you move toward the potential.

Second, we repeat our hurt in relationships. We use it as wedges and weapons. “Remember when you did that?” “But you did this!”

The Bible says in Proverbs 17:9, “Love forgets mistakes. Nagging about them parts the best of friends” (LB). It also parts marriages and every other relationship you have. Nagging doesn’t work.

Third, we repeat our hurt by telling it to other people. It’s called gossip! We tell everybody else except God and the person with whom we have the problem.

Did you know that God hates gossip? He hates it as much as he hates pride because that’s what gossip is. Gossip is pure and simple ego — trying to make ourselves look and feel better. Every time you share gossip, you are being prideful, and God hates pride and gossip.

Love keeps no record of wrongs. Love doesn’t repeat a wound so that it turns into resentment or gossip or pride. Love responds to hurt by letting it go.

“Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your own failings and shortcomings and let them drop” (Mark 11:25 AMP).

Talk It Over

What hurt have you rehearsed over and over in your mind that you need to let go of today?

Why do you think it’s easier to nag about a mistake rather than forgive it? Is it really easier in the long run?

What do you need to change about the way you respond to gossip?