Finding Great FriendsSample

First Peter talks about using your gifts to serve others as faithful stewards of God’s grace. Have you ever considered that using those things that you are good at is being a good steward of grace? 

What are you naturally good at? How can you use it to bless others? Don’t just consider the spiritual gifts listed in the Bible, although that’s a good reference point. But also look at your other attributes, talents, and passions. Think outside the box. 

For example, I tend to be good at being casual. Sound funny? That’s okay! But I only recently realized how big a blessing this is to others in helping them to relax with me, to not sweat the small stuff when we’re together. 

Another example would be a friend who is a trained physical therapist. I’m a clumsy exerciser with weak joints. Whenever I injure myself, I send her a quick email detailing the problem and she responds with a list of stretches and exercises to help me heal. To her, the effort is negligible because it’s what she does, what she loves. To me, the time she takes to tell me what to do is priceless.

One thing we should strive for, as well as look for in others, is wisdom. Where does that come from? Verses in both Proverbs and James make it clear: God. Be careful that you are striving to gain wisdom from God and not from this world. While men have a lot of great information that we can and should learn from, God’s wisdom goes farther than mere data. 

What does godly wisdom look like? James 3:17 says that “wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.”

I’ll be the first to admit that this passage of Scripture is very challenging. The traits that come with biblical wisdom are not natural to the flesh that we battle on a daily basis. And some people are just more difficult to live with than others. 

But Paul doesn’t give us an escape clause if we’re having a bad day, if the person in front of us is prickly, or if storm clouds rock our life. The good news is that God is asking for progression—not perfection. 

Practice these qualities. Be purposeful about growing them in your life. Ask God to help them become a bigger part of who you are. If you work at it, renewing your heart and mind with the truth God’s provided, you’ll see over time that you are more likely to default to God’s ways than man’s ways. To kindness, gentleness, and patience rather than quick tempers, rough words, and hostility.

Other verses come to mind that I’d love to share with you, but our space here is limited. In your quest for quality, godly friends, ask for wisdom from God and seek out His counsel within the Bible. Pray, asking Him to put those you most need where you will find them and to help you recognize the ones who most need you.