How to Live a Meaningful LifeSample

Extending Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something we all want to receive, yet it’s so challenging to give it to others. Part of what makes forgiveness so difficult is that we often want it to be a one-time event, but it’s usually a long-term process.

Not only does forgiveness take time but also it’s not always visible—at least not in the ways we might want it to be. The person who hurt us may never apologize or ask for our forgiveness. And that could make it feel pointless to start the process.

It’s also helpful to understand what forgiveness is—and what it’s not—so that we can live the abundant live Jesus promises us. First, forgiveness is not brushing the offenses under a rug or pretending like the hurt doesn’t exist.

Instead, forgiveness sets us free from a life of bitterness and hatred toward one of God’s children. Pastor Craig Groeschel has said, “Forgiveness may not change the other person, but it will always change you.”

Forgiveness allows us to process our feelings and emotions with God and people we trust so that we aren’t held back or left broken. Jesus wants to be in this messy process with us. He wants to carry our hurts and wipe our tears. But we must take the step to start forgiving.

When we do, we might just be surprised at how God shows up in our lives. As our Father sits with us in our pain, He slowly begins to heal our hearts. He’ll listen to our confusion and comfort us in ways only He can. When we hand our hurts over to God, He is faithful to take the burden from us. We don’t have to carry grudges or anger—and He doesn’t want us to.

But remember: Forgiveness may not immediately fix all your problems, but it does help you fix your eyes on Jesus. In fact, in one of Jesus’ last moments on earth—in the middle of being crucified, mocked, and tortured—He prays this prayer: Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they’re doing.

Immediately after praying that, people gamble for His clothes. So, forgiveness isn’t a magic button that makes the pain go away. But it is a choice that sets you and the other person free.

Pray: God, thank You for sending Jesus so that we could be forgiven and experience true, lasting freedom. Today, I realize I’m struggling to forgive _____. Help me forgive them, Father. Show me my next steps to stop fixating on the problem and fix my eyes on You. I trust You. In Jesus’ name, amen.