New Fruit: 7 Days of Porn Recovery for WomenSample

We know that pornography is a counterfeit for God’s design for intimacy and sex. If someone experiences the utter lack of proper attention, affection, and affirmation, she will do virtually anything to fill the void, even if it just hurts her more. Proverbs 27:7 says, “even bitter food tastes sweet to the hungry.” To someone lacking attention, affection, and affirmation, even the bitterness of pornography satisfies the pains of hunger. 

In his book Be Transformed, author and speaker Dr. Bob Schuchts explains the seven identity wounds which are at the root of our pornography addiction. These wounds (the root of our intimacy disorders and subsequently what feeds our addictions) greatly attribute to our sinful appetite. Each of these wounds speaks to your identity—to who you are or how you feel about yourself. 

Read the passages corresponding to each identity wound, paying close attention to the wounds you identify with. See how the promises of God offer the promise of better fruit than the old fruit of shame.

1. Rejection. If your wound is rejection, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “I am unacceptable as I am.” (John 6:37) 

2. Abandonment. If your wound is abandonment, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “I will always be alone.” (Isaiah 49:15)

3. Confusion. If your wound is confusion, a common belief you might have about yourself is “I don’t understand but I have to figure it out on my own.” (Prov. 3:5-6)

4. Fear. If your wound is fear, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “If I trust someone, I will be hurt or die.” (1 John 4:18)

5. Shame. If your wound is shame, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “I am unworthy or don’t deserve love.” (Rom. 5:8)

6. Hopelessness. If your wound is hopelessness, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “Things are never going to get better.” (Rom. 5:5)

7. Powerlessness. And finally, if your wound is powerlessness, a common belief you might have about yourself is, “I feel overwhelmed and stuck.” (2 Peter 1:3)

Reflection:

These seven identity wounds attack our very identities as daughters of God. Which of these identities hits closest to home for you?