How God's Love Changes Us: Part 3 - Overcoming Grief, Achieving ReconciliationSample
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Kindness to self is a lost art in Christendom, yet without it we become stuck in the early part of the restoration journey. Kindness is the grease of God to get our transformation moving. Kindness gives us the ability to press on even in the darkest of times. The father’s confrontation with his elder son is deeply rooted in love and the kindest of acts.
As the elder brother spews venom toward his father, the father does not cower but speaks of life and resurrection in the face of aggression and hatred. “We had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again” (Luke 15:32, niv).
The father’s confrontation is not intended to shame or harm his son for his lack of grace toward his brother; rather, the father models a confrontational kindness for the sake of love and redemption. Just as Jesus did in flipping tables in the temple (18:9-14), the father’s fierce love here is captured in how he fights for the elder’s restoration. Love precedes kindness. Without love, we cannot be kind.
The elder son knew the father loved him, and that is probably why he felt safe enough to rage at him. The father desperately wants the elder brother to join the party and taste the joy of unconditional love. It is important to remember that kindness is not mere niceness. Holy kindness is not for the faint of heart or the chronic people pleaser.
We need to confront ourselves and those we journey alongside with deep strength and tenderness. The father in the parable models this for us all.
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If we want to grow beyond the escapist impulse of the prodigal son and the resentful legalism of the elder son, we’ll need to face our grief. Once we do, we’ll find ourselves in the Father Realm, where true healing and reconciliation await.
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