More Than The Scoreनमुना

A Major League Baseball pitcher who was pretty good at mastering the concept of developing a process was Nolan Ryan. He was my childhood hero. I had the great privilege of meeting him in 2001. Nolan and I were working with one of the best coaches I have ever known, Tom House.

On the day of Nolan’s seventh no-hitter, he woke up feeling terrible. He forced himself to the ballpark, took some Advil, and headed to the bullpen for warmup. It didn’t last long. After a few pitches, Nolan walked off the mound, and instead of heading towards the dugout, he headed underneath the stands of the ballpark towards the clubhouse. 

The game was a few minutes from start time, but no Nolan. The position players took the field, no Nolan. The National Anthem began, still no Nolan. Finally, as the anthem finished, Nolan showed up and let his coach, Bobby Valentine, know there wasn’t much in the tank, and he might not even get through the first inning. The rest is history. I asked Tom once, “How in the world did Nolan throw a no-hitter, feeling horrible, without even completing his warmups in the bullpen?” Tom’s response was simple yet profound.

Tom said, “That night didn’t happen by chance. On a night when Nolan thought he might not make it through the first inning, he went back into the clubhouse, sat at his locker, and reminded himself about the process. He reminded himself that any Major Leaguer can pitch when they feel good, but he reflected on the reason his training was so intense and disciplined for his entire career, especially those past few years he and I worked together. That process was built for a night like this when nothing was coming together or felt right. Nolan was determined to walk on that mound and give it everything he had because he relied on that process that we built. It was one that would sustain him through that night.”

Parenting is all about the process. Those days when I didn’t feel my best or when the kids were out of control, I would remind myself, it is all about the process. Just stick to the hard work and the discipline, and focus on what needs to happen at that moment. It doesn’t always work in our favor each day. But in the end, the process of becoming a faithful parent, taken one day at a time, will result in a huge win.