Relationship Advice For MenParaugs

Kids and Time

“I’m my kids’ hero because I stand in the water with them.” Roger Thompson, We Stood Upon Stars 

So, Roger and I have become friends. Honestly, it started out pretty random. I saw one of his Bible Plans here, read his book, then messaged him on Instagram. Not too many weeks later I found myself halfway across the country, waking up before the sun to the smell of his wife’s pumpkin cinnamon rolls coming from their kitchen.

Roger and his wife were talking with their oldest son. It was a solid hour earlier than what seemed necessary to get him off to school. I soon discovered why.

Roger piled his half-awake teenage son, a surf board, my brother, and me into his vintage VW van. On our way toward the coastline, Roger asked his son where he wanted to surf. He apparently picked a great spot, because he caught wave after wave as Roger stood watching in the cool morning sand, proud as could be. After about an hour, a cold wetsuit was traded for dry school clothes, a surf board for a backpack, and finally Roger dropped his sandy-ankled teenager off at school with an already proven, “I love you, buddy.”

This moment has impacted my parenting, the way I treat my nieces and nephews, and how I invest in people younger than me more than any book, or how-to. The lived-out, kind, patient, and truly interested love I saw on display was richer and more palpable than the cinnamon roll in my gut.

Roger is busy. He speaks, writes books, writes films, consults, and was leading a major building project at the time. Yet he carves out an hour, when the surf’s good, and sometimes when it isn’t, to love his son.

Where can you carve out time for the kids in your life? Maybe you don’t have your own children. That’s okay—Jesus didn’t. He still said the words you’re about to read in Matthew and Mark.

Watch today’s video, and then consider the question below.

Consider: How can I carve out time to show my kids (or other people younger than me) that they matter to me and they matter to God? When will I start?