Admit - Self Actualization

She was as white as a ghost, saying she thought I had died several times in the night.

That was the feedback after having just completed a sleep apnea study - the technicians who do these studies are used to seeing a myriad of cases, and in this instance, they had genuine concern for my life.

Waiting for the doctor to review the results was nerve-wracking. Would they say it is no big deal, that it could be managed with medicine, or could it be worse? After reviewing the study results, they shared that not only was it the worst case they had ever seen, but they also said that at 29 years old, my risk for heart disease, stroke, or worse was through the roof. This prompted the next question, “Do you want to get better”?

Getting “better” meant a lot of work, much of which I did not want to do. My underlying mindset was that doctors are supposed to scare us to protect themselves, and it could not be as bad as they said. The one thing I could not ignore was the symptoms, including having to stop every fifteen minutes from driving so I wouldn’t fall asleep, dizziness from elevated blood pressure, which never allowed my body to rest, and the energy level of an 85-year-old. This was the reality I had accepted.

While sitting with the doctor and looking over the data, my self-awareness snapped into view. This was no longer something that I could blame on someone or something else. I had a problem, and admitting it was incredibly challenging. No one ever wants to admit we have a problem, and I was no exception. However, the road to recovery can never begin until we start with the acceptance of a need.

Reflecting upon the scripture in John 5, Jesus asked a similar question, (Do you want to be well?) and that may strike us as odd. However, having the same question asked in my scenario made me pause and consider if I truly wanted to begin the journey to healing. When we consider this further, it seems to make sense that the answer to this question isn't just about physical healing - it's about spiritual and emotional readiness to embrace change. Admitting our need for change is the first step to healing, and it requires an in-depth look at our afflictions, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual. Acknowledging change is necessary! This process of self-actualization means recognizing our current state and having the courage to desire something better.

Questions to Consider

1. When facing a significant life change, how do you assess your spiritual and emotional readiness to embrace that change?
2. What has been your most challenging experience admitting your need for help or change? How did acknowledging this need impact your path to recovery or improvement?