Who am I?

Who am I is a question I find myself wrestling with more and more as I get older.

Doubting my abilities and questioning my significance is a recurring theme that quite often holds me back from taking risks. I wanted to see who in the Bible ran into the same issues and found myself looking at the life of Moses.

When I think of Moses I go straight to the great leader he was, how he was relentless in serving others especially when they did not deserve it and his resolve to see things through. Yet, upon studying scripture a different picture appears to be the case in his journey. We get to see a glimpse into his own insecurities, fears, and self-doubt.

After he was called by God to go to Pharaoh he began to play a game that I know all too well. It is called the excuse game and I think deep down we all are masterful at executing this at the highest level. He heard the charge from God and immediately fell into questioning his abilities. He thought people might think he was lying, or that his past would show up. I mean he did kill a guy in an argument the last time he was in Egypt, and he even let his own hurdles such as how he spoke hold him back from embracing the call.

One thing that jumped out at me as I was studying Moses appears to be that his personal awareness was overshadowing God’s sovereignty. Moses, like the rest of us, modeled his behavior out of what he believed to be true - not what God was revealing as the Truth. My own reflection is that God designed Moses exactly the way He desired knowing that He would use him at this appointed time and place.

Think about that for a second - the God of the universe designed you, with all the insecurity and doubts that we have, to use us exactly how He desires. That means when we ask the question, Who am I, the natural instinct should be I am a son/daughter of the King and I’m going to take steps of obedience no matter what I’m being called to. At the end of the day, our ability to make an impact for the Kingdom has very little to do with what we perceive as our strengths and way more to do with our ability to do with our willingness to pick up our cross and follow Him no matter what is asked!

Questions to Consider

1. In what ways do you find yourself playing the "excuse game" like Moses when faced with challenges or opportunities God presents to you?
2. Considering Moses' journey from doubt to leadership, what steps can you take to embrace your identity as a child of God and follow His call with confidence, regardless of personal insecurities?