Faith Steps for Weary Momsಮಾದರಿ

Overcoming Comparison

Do you find yourself constantly questioning yourself as a mom? Are you constantly looking around to see if you measure up? Do you feel a bit unsure in your parenting decisions because you sometimes make different choices than those around you?

It's easy to compare, but today we are going to talk about God's wonderful gift and promise of wisdom and how it can set us free as moms and allow us to celebrate differences.

Comparison is defined as “to look at two things and see how they are similar and how they are different.”

This very act can lead us down the road of envy and jealousy. It can also lead to pride.

In James 3:16 it says, “For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.”

Take a moment and ask yourself…

How have I let envy affect me? How do I let comparison impact and shape me as a mother?

There is nothing wrong with learning from other moms or doing your research (i.e. Instagram, Blogs, Pinterest). However, our minds and hearts have to be in the right place. We should be going to GOD first for wisdom.

Isaiah 40:11 says, “He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young.”

In some translations, feed is “to tend.” It can also mean “to nourish, to sustain and to manage.” Just think about that for a minute and rest in the promise that He will nourish and sustain you.

James 1:5 says, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.”

Our father’s wisdom surpasses it all!

Commentary on James 1:5 from the Life Application Study Bible points out that the wisdom God has includes three distinct characteristics: It is practical, divine, and Christ-like.

How awesome to know that our God provides this wisdom for our specific circumstances and questions. I also love that God promises to give it generously. Have you asked God for that wisdom before turning to anything or anyone else? He will definitely use other people in your life to speak wisdom, but we have to first fix our eyes on the Lord.

Comparison has existed through the ages and wasn’t birthed with the rise of social media. It’s an instinct, but our approach is crucial. We must not compare ourselves to one another but rather to God’s standard.

In John 21:20-22 Peter compares himself to John. “Peter turned around and saw behind them the disciple Jesus loved—the one who had leaned over to Jesus during supper and asked, ‘Lord, who will betray you?’ Peter asked Jesus, ‘What about him, Lord?’ Jesus replied, ‘If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? As for you, follow me.’”

Jesus’ manner of response is a little funny when you think about it. It reminds me of the many times my mother said, “Did I tell so and so to do ‘blank?’ No, I told you. Please do as I asked and follow my instruction.” That is just what Jesus is saying here. It doesn't matter what He orchestrated for John; it matters what He was asking of Peter.

2 Corinthians 10:12-13 talks about comparing yourself to God and not to others. The verse says, “Oh, don’t worry; we wouldn’t dare say that we are as wonderful as these other men who tell you how important they are! But they are only comparing themselves with each other, using themselves as the standard of measurement. How ignorant! We will not boast about things done outside our area of authority. We will boast only about what has happened within the boundaries of the work God has given us, which includes our working with you.”

Paul is speaking of the Pharisees here and their need to compare themselves to one another and use that as the standard of measurement. Instead we should boast in the work God has accomplished, work together, and seek His direction.

Reminder for the day:

God wants to give you tailor-made wisdom.

Action Steps:

1. Seek our Father for His tailor-made wisdom by spending some time in prayer each morning. Pray and listen for at least 15 minutes.
2. Limit the need to compare by identifying the outlets that tend to be your downfall (i.e. social media, social groups, news, blogs) and fast from them for 1 week.
3. Reflect on all the times God has given you direction and you obeyed. What did that feel like? How did that situation turn out?
4. Give praise where it's due. Boast in the Father and His provision, not in a haughty way but as an act of PRAISE.