Transforming Feelings

“In a situation such as today, by contrast, where people constantly have—or think they have—to decide what to do, they will almost invariably be governed by feelings. Often they cannot distinguish between their feelings and their will, and in their confusion they also quite commonly take feelings to be reasons. And they will in general lack any significant degree of self-control. This will turn their life into a mere drift through the days and years, which addictive behavior promises to allow them to endure.” - Dallas Willard, excerpted from Renovation of the Heart

How many times have you heard someone saying, “That’s just the way I feel”? On the surface, this is not a harmful phrase. But in reality, it is naive and deceptive.

If someone betrays us, we feel hurt. If someone blatantly mistreats another person, we feel anger. These examples remind us that feelings, appropriately placed, have purpose and power. Too often, though, we are advised to go with our gut. In other words, “trust your feelings.”

Much of our world’s advertising is designed to evoke misplaced feelings in us so we will buy this thing or that. We are made to feel old by a makeup commercial, so we feel a need to buy a wrinkle-reducer. We are told by car advertisers that we are to “love” our cars even though they can’t love us back.

Feeling, appropriately ordered, is at the heart of spiritual formation into Christlikeness. The experiences and moments that move us toward making meaning—self-giving love, steadfast hope, lasting peace, and constant joy—are the genuine markers of rightly placed feelings. In transformation into Christlikeness, these meaning-making moments provide richness and clarity for a life journey that is not just drifting through years, but is directed toward being engulfed by God. We are not governed by our flimsy disordered feelings.

Reflection

When do I characteristically do things simply because they feel good?

Prayer

God, I cannot count on my feelings alone. In a world where we are bombarded by messages telling us how to feel, help me run to you first. You created feelings to be a good part of my nature. Where they have been manipulated, redeem them.  I lift this to you in the gracious name of Jesus, Amen.