Identityಮಾದರಿ

Day 3: My value and significance come from a humble dependence on God.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you that my value is secure in Christ and because of that, I don’t have to be right.  Amen.

Reading:

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who always had to be right? They never take the blame and never apologize. And if you ever challenge them, they just dig in their heels all the more. Perhaps you know that person really well because you see them every time you look in the mirror.

The truth is, no one sets out to be wrong. There is something in all of us that likes being right. The challenge is when we care more about being right than we care about relationships. As followers of Christ, we are called to love others well. But it’s difficult to love others well when we elevate being right over the relationship. Having to always be right comes with many downsides. Here are just a few:

• We aren’t relationally safe with others.   
• We fail to reach our full potential because we aren’t willing to admit when we’re wrong.   
• Our capacity for relational intimacy with God and others is diminished.

Having to be right is a heavy and lonely burden to bear.

When we find ourselves leaning in that direction, it’s important to consider what’s fueling that behavior. Whether it was modeled for us or was a means of coping, we developed a false belief: I must be right to know I am of value.

If this is true for you, maybe the most important thing you can know is this: Your value is not linked with being right. Your value is linked with being in Christ. And your value, in his eyes, is without measure.

The next thing to know is that always having to be right is a form of pride, and pride doesn’t look good on anyone, especially for those who identify with Jesus. Peter, who walked with Jesus and observed perfect humility in action on a daily basis, writes in a letter to fellow believers, 

“All of you, clothe yourselves with humility to one another, because God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (1 Peter 5:5)

When we find our value in having to be right, we position ourselves in opposition to God. But when we choose to surrender our need to be right, we position ourselves within God’s favor. And that’s a much better place to live.

Pride in any form is always a tasteless, ill-fitting garment, but humility is always in style, flattering in every way.

So instead of believing you need to be right to have value, tell yourself what’s true instead: My value and significance come from a humble dependence on God. 

Reflection: 

What would it look like for me to embrace the freedom to be wrong, to apologize, and to see someone else’s perspective today?