How Identity is Formed

Let’s talk about how we got to this point. Our identity is the totality of us. We have an identity that has been formed over time by guessing what - our mind, will (behaviors), and emotions are. Our identity is our thoughts and emotions connecting to form a belief that informs how we will behave. For example, if you believe that you’re a good wife, a good parent, or a good friend, you will think, feel and behave like what you believe a good wife, parent, or friend looks like. Each action and interaction that supports this further supports your belief that you are a good wife, parent, or friend.

Over time, because our brains aren’t designed to hold millions of thoughts at once, it creates a continued thought, emotion, and behavior combination. Then that combination becomes encased into a habit. That belief and a series of habits then create our identity. If you believe or think that you are a good wife, parent, or friend, the habits that you walk out daily are a part of that identity, and you don’t even have to think about them because they are now a part of who you are. Proverbs 23:7 says, “ For as he thinketh within himself, so is he.” What you believe over time becomes your identity.

Our identity is impacted by how we see ourselves and our circumstances. Our brain plays a huge role in how we live our lives. The brain is made up of different sections that control certain aspects of what we do. Because most of what we think (80-90%) comes from our subconscious brain, the life we live now reflects those thoughts. The identity we have now has been forming since the day we were born. We can have the identity of the victim, conqueror, someone with strength, someone who folds under pressure, someone who doesn’t stand up for themselves, someone who settles for less, someone who walks in their purpose, or someone who lives an abundant life. How we identify ourselves is up to us, but how God identifies us is up to Him. The disconnect comes when the way we identify ourselves doesn't align with the way God sees us. The cause of this disconnect comes from our beliefs about ourselves and God. Our beliefs inform how we feel and behave. If we don’t believe what God says about us, then how we think, feel, and behave will reflect that disbelief.

The way we identify ourselves can either serve us well or take away from us. We have to be intentional about aligning with how God identifies us and feed those habits and work to remove the ones that don’t.

Application / Reflection:

1. In what ways have you identified yourself that align with how God sees you in Ephesians 2:10?

2. How have your beliefs hindered you or helped you become more like God's vision for you?