Christian Dating Dilemma: Is It Better to Start as Friends?Sample

Day 3: Challenges of Being Friends First

Choosing to start as friends before dating comes with its own set of challenges, especially when it comes to setting boundaries. Proverbs 11:3 tells us, “The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.” This scripture emphasizes the need for honesty and integrity, which are super important when defining boundaries in a budding relationship.

When you start as friends, it’s easy to blur the lines between friendship and romance, particularly if there’s chemistry from the get-go. This can lead to confusion and misunderstandings if you’re not careful about setting clear boundaries. The key here is communication — being upfront about your intentions and desires prevents assumptions and helps you both feel secure.

So, what might these boundaries look like? First, think about emotional boundaries. It’s important to protect your heart by not diving too deep emotionally until you’re both ready to consider a romantic relationship. This might mean holding back on sharing the deepest parts of your heart until you both agree on the direction of your relationship.

Physical boundaries are also important. Decide together what level of physical interaction is appropriate while maintaining a friendship. This might include limiting or avoiding behaviors typically associated with dating, like holding hands or spending too much alone time in intimate settings.

Social boundaries are worth considering as well. Be clear about how you’ll introduce each other to friends and family and how you’ll present your relationship on social media. This helps manage expectations and avoids sending mixed signals to those around you.

The most important aspect is to have ongoing conversations about these boundaries. Check in with each other regularly to make sure both of you are comfortable and that your boundaries are being respected. Remember, integrity is your guide. Let it lead you to make decisions that honor God, your values, and each other’s feelings.

By navigating these challenges with open communication and mutual respect, you pave the way for a relationship built on a solid foundation. Whether you remain friends or transition to a romantic relationship, your integrity and faith will serve as the compass that guides your journey together.