Survival Guide to Motherhood: A 7-Day Parenting Pep TalkSample

Day 5: Take Charge of Your Home

The truth is, neither your toddler nor your teenager needs or wants to be in charge of your household. But unfortunately, in many homes, they are. You know as well as I do that this disordered system doesn’t work for anyone. And the only way to fix it? For you, as the parent, to take charge again.

Obviously, this shift doesn’t happen overnight; it happens over time. You adjust your schedule, routine, and happiness to accommodate your child's needs. In other words, you give in. Of course, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with giving in every now and then; it’s just not good to do it all the time. That creates a pattern that will eventually cause you to lose yourself and your home.

So, right here and now, I’m giving you permission to stand firm and regain control of your home. You are the parent, and with that role comes the responsibility—the calling—to take charge. This is your title—your job. Don’t let the chaos of everyday life steal it from you. Don’t let your kids slide into the role of parent by accident or on purpose. Your home is just that: your home. So when you see it slipping out of control, it’s your responsibility to take it back!

I can say this with boldness because God said it first. In His design, the mother and the father are the boss. God first tells us this in the Ten Commandments. You know about them, right? They are the big ones. Well, listed among them is “Honor your father and your mother” Exodus 20:12 (NASB). Then, we hear it again in the New Testament:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may be well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth” (Ephesians 6:1-3).

We hear it a third time in Colossians 3:20:

Children obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

This isn’t my idea; it’s God’s design. Of course you can listen to your child and allow them to express their creativity while still asking them to obey and respect you as their authority. It is your home. You have waited a lifetime to establish it, so be the boss.

There will be times when your kids get angry with you because of your decisions as the boss. That’s to be expected. When you take a stand, it will be hard. At times you will get pushback, so be ready. Sometimes it will seem like your kids are testing you every step of the way, but don’t let that get you down. Remember God’s encouragement:

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up (Galatians 6:9).

It’s true that being a mom is hard, but that doesn’t mean you give up. Doesn’t every job include things you don’t like? The same is true with the job of being a mom. So rather than give up, rise to the challenge!

In what moments do you feel most confident as a mother? Why? What strengths do you have in these moments (e.g., knowledge, experience, compassion) that you can bring to or develop for moments when you feel less confident?