Hope After Divorce: Trusting God Through the Pain a 5-Day Plan by Pamela ManningSample

Beyond Bitterness

Let’s face it, things can become downright ugly during a divorce, and bitterness will brutally attack anyone unprepared for battle. Unwanted words and deeds by either party can cause sour, bitter feelings to take root. And before we know it, this powerful enemy will choke our inner peace and darken our souls.

During my divorce, I experienced many cycles of ruminating over everything that went wrong in my marriage. The cycles began with me pointing my finger at others, stating all of my complaints, and remaining justified in my bitterness. Notice how many times the word, MY, appeared during these cycles. I was overtaken by my own bitterness.

In the Book of Ruth, we meet Naomi, a woman who had experienced the death of her husband and two sons. Losing a loved one through death or other circumstances (such as divorce) is devastating, and Naomi likely lived through extreme grief, worry, and hopelessness.

Naomi eventually returned to her homeland, and upon her arrival, she told the townspeople not to call her Naomi, but “Instead, call me Mara, for the Almighty has made life very bitter for me.” (Ruth 1:20) For Naomi, ‘Mara’ symbolized the intense bitterness that she felt was from the Lord. Like Naomi, we can find ourselves walking around with the word Mara tattooed on our foreheads. However, as we experience bitterness, we must not allow bitterness to take root within us. (Hebrews 12:15)

Several chapters later, God generously provided for Naomi through her daughter-in-law, Ruth. Her blessings came at a time when she needed them the most, and she was delighted by how God had provided. Even the women in the town were overjoyed and blessed the Lord for His provision. (Ruth 4:14-15) The Lord had not abandoned His kindness after all; He was still at work in Naomi’s life.

Encouragement:

Bitterness is difficult, but God can soothe our hearts. Removing bitterness begins with our willingness to trust God, ask Him for help, and acknowledge that in both good and bad circumstances, He can rescue us from this strangling enemy.

When bitterness wanes, like Naomi, we can experience that ray of light and glean the wonderful works of God. Our willingness to return to the Lord will bring healing, restoration, and hope. When we walk in the Lord’s power, we can move beyond bitterness.