Authentic Leadership: How to Lead With Nothing to Hide, Nothing to Prove, and Nothing to LoseSample

The Weight of Expectation

Sometimes insecurity in leadership doesn't start inside you. Sometimes it starts around you. When people around you have high expectations for your performance, when they expect you to pull a rabbit out of your hat, or make unrealistic demands on your time... it can lead to crippling insecurity. High-performing leaders face that all the time. If you win a championship, land a big client, master a challenging task, or produce an incredible quarter... people will be thrilled, and then they'll expect you to do it again. In those moments, people feel a strong temptation to project confidence and pretend they can pull it off.

The result is, you guessed it... an insecurity gap.

But some people have learned how to keep insecurity at bay. Some people don’t succumb to the temptation to pretend and perform. Instead of crumbling under the weight of others’ expectations, these people operate with a natural confidence that communicates, “Maybe I can’t do everything, but here’s what I can do.”

The Pressure to Perform and Pretend

The ancient writers of the Bible tell a story of a young man named Joseph, and how he dealt with the pressure to pretend. The Pharaoh, the King of Egypt, approached him to interpret a dream. The Pharaoh had just experienced a terrifying dream, but as he turned to his wisest advisors, he realized no one was able to help him understand what he saw. He said to Joseph, “I heard you can interpret dreams.”

This was close to the truth. Accurately explaining the meaning of at least two dreams before, Joseph had a track record of helping people understand what they couldn’t understand on their own. He was exceptional and could have carried that mantle as an interpreter if he wanted.

But Joseph saw the trap of high expectations. He surprised everyone with his answer. He knew if the Pharaoh thought he could interpret dreams once, he would be called upon to do it other times. The reality was that Joseph had no idea how or why he was able to interpret dreams. He understood it as a pure, random gift from God. To answer “yes” would have been to feed the hype. It would have inferred that he could summon the ability at will, which he couldn’t.

Turning to the Pharaoh, the most powerful person on earth, Joseph was authentically confident and straight- forward. He refused to allow the Pharaoh to think of Joseph as anything more than what he was. So, he said, “I cannot, but God can.”

Simple as that.

I can’t do that. But I can ask God, who I know can do it.

I can’t do this, but here’s what I can do.

Authentic Leaders Refuse to Over-Promise:

Imagine if you said that when people hoisted expectations on you.

• I can’t promise we’ll go undefeated, but I can promise that I’ll rally the team and we’ll play our best every night.
• I can’t promise this company will grow, but I can promise I’ll do everything I can to help you and this company reach its fullest potential.
• I can’t promise the deal will go through, but what I can promise is that we will be prepared to offer them the best we have.

It’s tempting to over-promise and perform to please people. Especially those who are counting on us. We want to live up to those who have high expectations for us. But that’s a recipe for instant insecurity and eventual disaster.

Instead, Authentic Leaders believe God has positioned them to serve them by serving others. Their goal isn’t to meet others' expectations… it’s to please their father by serving their brother and sister with everything they have.