Reset: A 7-Day Plan for Building Positive HabitsSample

New Year, New You?

At the beginning of every New Year, many people come up with a list of things they want to change. Some common resolutions include exercising more, saving money, losing weight, paying off debt, traveling, and spending more time with family. You might resonate with some of those goals, but yours might even run a little deeper: wasting less time, kicking a porn habit, being less distracted and more present, having less conflict in your relationships, getting more involved in church, reading more books, or something else unique to you.

So we try to adjust or tweak a few external behaviors—wake up earlier, eat fewer calories, go to the gym, buy more books—and hope they trigger some sort of long-term effect. But a few months into the new behavior, we almost inevitably find ourselves back to our old habits. It doesn’t matter how old you are, your occupation or career, your socioeconomic status, race, gender, or even how long you’ve been a Christian. We all have old patterns we can find ourselves returning to.

“I Do Not Understand What I Do.”

The apostle Paul himself struggled with this same behavior modification problem when he said, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do” (Romans 7:15 NKJV).

We’re not alone in this struggle. Repeating the same patterns. Drawn back into the same old cycles. Take note of Paul’s phrase: “I do not understand what I do.” When we don’t understand why we do what we do, we’ll find ourselves doing the same things again and again. Understanding why we do what do, and learning to dig a little deeper, is paramount to changing our behavior. Paul addresses the Corinthian church with this same idea, reminding them that when we remove any mask or veil to get to the bottom of our behavior, then God can begin the transformation process in us: “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

What You Think Leads To How You Feel

Most people go about their lives unaware of this life-changing truth: thoughts lead to feelings, and feelings lead to behaviors. That is why trying to change your life starting with external behaviors alone will usually lead you to a dead end—because you’re actually starting at the end! What’s happening in your mind is so key to the process of transformation and change, and knowledge of it (or lack thereof) ultimately leads to why some people succeed and others fail.

Change happens by going underneath the surface. Get to the roots, own your thoughts, and understand your feelings. This is what leads to modifying your behaviors and ultimately changing your life. Thought change leads to life change.