The Secret: How Do You See Love?Sample

The Beautiful Synergy

Written By: Nia Hendricks

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”—Ephesians 5:22 (NKJV)

There is a beautiful synergy that exists in the love between a husband and wife. Paul explains that this synergy should actually be a representation of our relationship with Christ.

A husband who loves His wife as Christ loves the church is a kind and trustworthy man, worthy of the wife’s submission. With his love, he encourages his wife to follow him. A wife, who safely trusts her husband and honors his leadership as the Church does Jesus, is a grace and delight for her husband to care for. Her support encourages affection.

But, truth be told, we’re not all as easy to love and honor as we’d like to be. The secret to honoring your spouse is simple: pursue Jesus and His love for you. Let Him be your covering, your leader, your headship, your support, and the center of your attention. As you trust Jesus, He will empower you to love your spouse the way you always hope to!

In today’s verse, we see the wife’s charge: “Wives, submit to your own husbands.” Ladies, your husband is the leader of your family because that’s God’s design. I don’t always understand why the Lord designed it this way, and it surely isn’t always easy (we women are tender creatures), but I believe that He did this for our good. 

I love the way The Message translation describes the relationship: “Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands” (Ephesians 5:22-24 MSG).

Because I know that God is good and that His intentions are pure, I can disregard the fear of inferiority. I need not fear to bow before a God who loves me and cares for me as His child. Therefore, I need not resist coming under the covering of my husband who imitates Christ’s love.

In the most certain and uncertain of times, pursue and submit to Jesus. He will guide and direct your family and act justly on your behalf. Marriage is the sole symbol God has chosen to represent His love for the Church; surely He intended it to be rooted deeply in love and joy.

DIG: Wives, does your husband feel trusted? Why or why not? Husbands, does your wife feel loved in a way that leads her to trust you? Why or why not?

DISCOVER: Do you trust that God is always good? Search for Scripture that affirms His trustworthiness and loving nature.

DISPLAY: In what ways can you better support your spouse? Look for ways to affirm God’s love over your spouse.