Defeating DespairSample

Defeating Despair

DAY 4 OF 4

CONNECTION + COMMUNITY

Where is God prompting me to become more involved with a loving community?

Without a sense of purpose, other people can mean little to us because we no longer value ourselves. In the Scriptures highlighted today, God invites us to let go of the burden and loneliness of pretending we are self-sufficient and join with others in community.

When we lose our sense of purpose and meaning, we lose our sense of connection to others and God; we lose our sense of community. Without a sense of purpose, other people mean little to us because we no longer value ourselves.

A veteran sat in a veterans’ hospital’s outpatient clinic group for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The chaplain had just asked the group, “What is the most difficult aspect of dealing with PTSD?” An older veteran began, “For me it is the loneliness. I feel like no one can understand what I am going through. After I gave up on life, I didn’t want to be around people. I was suspicious of anyone who reached out to me. I thought they were only trying to con me or get something from me. I became sarcastic and had a nasty attitude. I really believed I didn’t need anybody else and I told anybody who would listen.”

Another veteran came to see the chaplain, saying, “I am soon to be discharged from the alcohol and drug treatment program. I think I have done well in the 28 days of treatment, but now the counselors are telling me that I need to get a sponsor. They are saying there is no way I can stay sober without a sponsor. Chaplain, I got Jesus and I got God. I don’t think I need a sponsor; I don’t need other people in my life.”

When we give up on letting others be a core part of our lives, it is often because of a significant loss in our lives. We have had an idea—for example, “If I am good, nothing bad will happen to me or to those I love.” Or we have a relationship—for example, a spouse, lover, friend—to whom we can no longer hold fast. Perhaps we are sick in spite of having been a good person; perhaps our spouse, lover, or friend dies, becomes ill, or leaves us. It is then that we are tempted to give up, to believe life has no purpose. It is then that our hurt and grief tempt us to pull away from connection and community. It is then that we may tell ourselves, “I am never going to have high ideals again. I am never going to let myself be hurt again. I am going to build a shell around myself and let no one or no purpose ever enter my heart again.”

There is good news: God has felt this same pain each time we have left our relationship with God. Yet God has not given up on us. God invites us to reconnect with him and with others. We are invited to let go of the burden and loneliness of pretending we are self-sufficient and join the community. Through many generations, people have received this same invitation. We are in good company, as shown in the Scriptures below.

Readings from the Old Testament

At the time of creation, God provided humankind with companionship.

Genesis 2:18, 21-23

The Ten Commandments, given to Moses at Mount Sinai, form the basis of a committed relationship between God and God’s people and is foundational to life in community.

Exodus 20:1-17

Moses’ father-in-law, Jethro, advises Moses to delegate leadership responsibilities to others so that he does not have to bear the burden alone.

Exodus 18:17-21a, 22-25a

Life in community involves providing for the poor and respecting all people.

Leviticus 19:9, 10, 17, 18, 33, 34

Like a loving husband, God continues to reach out to his people.

Hosea 2:23

The prophet Micah teaches what God requires to live in community with one another and in fellowship with God.

Micah 6:8

Readings from the New Testament

Jesus speaks of the importance of staying grounded in God’s Word.

Matthew 4:4

Jesus teaches about God’s ruling activity and God’s will. He offers a vision of God’s kingdom that is marked by justice.

Matthew 5:1-10

Matthew 5:13-16

Matthew 5:23, 24

Matthew 5:43-48

Nothing can separate us from God’s love. The apostle Paul wrote:

Romans 8:28, 38-39

Love binds everything together. The apostle Paul wrote:

1 Corinthians 13

Thoughts for reflection:

  • Make a list of the various ways you have turned away from others who have offered to befriend or love you.
  • What frightens you about letting yourself be loved by God and others?
  • What frightens you about offering yourself to be a member of a loving community?
  • What is the next step you are willing to take to become more involved with a loving community?
  • What is the next step you are willing to take to accept God’s presence as a reality in your daily life?

Prayer

Dear God, I have wandered away from my true identity as your child. My attention has been diverted by many things. Because I was hurt, I have turned away from you. Because others have been imperfect, I have turned away from them. I have expected them to be more than I can be. Because I have seen those who live by low ideals, I have given up my high ideals.

As I have wandered away from you, I know I am slowly dying. As I have closed my heart to others, I only make my own pain and loneliness worse. Help me turn around. Help me open my heart. Help me give you the pain I carry within me and dare to reach out to others. Help me begin to hope again. Help me take one next step to be in a loving community today. Amen.

A Blessing for You

May the LORD bless you and take care of you;
May the LORD be kind and gracious to you;
May the LORD look on you with favor and give you peace.
Numbers 6:24-26

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Day 3

About this Plan

Defeating Despair

Sometimes life is dark and difficult, leading us to despair. You may wonder, " Why am I here? What’s the point? Why do bad things happen?" When life seems empty and futile, you need to know God understands and has a purpose for you. In this study, you will learn how pain can drive you to make significant changes that can lead to a life full of meaning and hope.

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