Verified: Prioritizing Internal Growth in an Image-Driven WorldSample

The Comparison Trap

Comparison happens naturally, without thinking many times.

If you’ve ever put down your phone feeling worse than you did when you first picked it up, then you’ve likely been there.

Your thoughts toward yourself become more doubtful.

You find yourself more frustrated.

You begin to feel behind and discontent with your place in life.

Feelings of admiration for this person become displaced envy.

It’s all so implicit- a subtle takeover and arrest of your mind and spirit, stealing your contentment, your peace, and sense of self.

We know this happens. Comparison is a trap because, in either way we apply it, it never leads to a healthy outcome. We either overestimate others and underestimate ourselves, or are classifying others as less than ourselves to compensate for voids of insecurity. 

So, here are a couple of ways to start seeing comparison in a new light when you feel its grips drawing you in.

1. Comparison is misplaced admiration.

Comparison, while normal, is counterproductive. Instead, try asking yourself:

“What is it that’s drawing me to them? Is it their work ethic, their willingness to take risks, their boldness of conviction, their mastery of skill?”

Then consider how these may simply be areas you want to improve in. And that’s okay.

Many times, we’re actually seeing qualities in others that we want to grow in ourselves or we may admire the way they carry out their skill but it’s not for us; in which we have to embrace our individual differences. They have their areas of strength and you are growing in your own. Learn to separate the two.

2. Internal work is more valuable.

The right amount of strategy, angle and consistency can now create a pretty expansive platform for any type of person. And I’m not knocking strategy or hard work- they’re essential and admirable. However, the unintended consequence of image-based media and quick rises to fame is that we can become a culture that overvalues outward appearances, status, followers, and presentation.

I’m convinced your internal growth is much more valuable and sustaining, regardless of where others are in their achievements. Character, conviction, and integrity are underrated because they’re less entertaining and grow in the hidden valleys of life. Yet, the works you produce will only go as deep as the work you've done with your own soul. These convictions aren’t based on popular approval.

Conviction is the prodding and poking of the spirit that reminds you when you aren’t aligned with who you are made to be, the hard and righteous thing you ought to do, and the necessary boundaries as they align with where life is calling you.

Image says I should do this because people will approve, it will open such doors, my works will be recognized, and my name respected. Conviction says I have to do this. It would be outside of my being to not do this. Any opportunities achieved are the byproduct of the character of my work and its righteous indignation, for reasons besides myself.

In conviction we find ourselves in this flow of true peace and fulfillment because you are in your lane; you are in the center of God’s will. And we all have to pause long enough to give our convictions space in a world oversaturated with content and achievements constantly snatching our attention.

What if we saw these qualities, instead, as a mark of success? I think they are.

You are most empowered in your calling, by growing in the way that God is currently shaping you according to your makeup and the purpose over your life. Never forfeit that.

Pause & reflect:

• What are some of the boundaries you’ve committed to that you would like to have personally around social media?
• Is there anyone you find yourself comparing to often? Consider, what are the underlying skills you admire and what you’d like to grow in?
• What are your own personal strengths that you find valuable?