When Forgiving Is Too HardSample

No More Sleepless Nights

At the end of the last evening meeting of this retreat, I had all the women write in their Bibles the name of the person(s) they needed to forgive and date it, and then I led them in a prayer of forgiveness. After that, we all went to bed.

The next morning before we headed back to civilization, we had one final meeting and the women shared testimonies about how the teaching and the prayer to forgive had impacted their lives. I was thrilled by all that God had done. So many women reported that after forgiving, they had felt so much peace, so much joy, and their hearts were light. There were some awesome testimonies as forgiveness set so many of them free.

At the very end, Sheila raised her hand from back there on the fireplace, and I couldn’t wait to hear her testimony. Even still, I wasn’t ready for it, because she shocked me.

She started by saying, “Last night, I slept through the night for the first time in 20 years.”

Her announcement was greeted with stunned silence. I wondered if everyone was thinking the same thing I was thinking: “She hasn’t slept through the night in 20 years? How horrible!” (Apparently, unforgiveness can keep you awake at night.)

This is one of the reasons why Colossians 3:13 says, “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.”

There are many good reasons to forgive – the main reason is to obey God! – but we also must do it for our benefit. Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other guy to die. It’s eating our lunch! It might even be keeping us up at night like it did Sheila.

God doesn’t want that for you – He wants you to be free from that kind of bondage and torment, and forgiveness is the way to get there.