What Does the Bible Say About Friendships?Sýnishorn

Wherever You Go: The Cost of Friendship

I’m sure you’ve heard it said before: “I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine.”

Or maybe, “Relationships are 50/50.”

It’s true—some friendships are perfectly equal and mutually beneficial. But now and again, a friendship isn’t quite so simple.

The book of Ruth is famously known as a love story between its namesake, Ruth, and a dashing farm boy (well, more like a man) named Boaz. But it’s not only a love story. It’s a friendship story.

Put yourself in Ruth’s shoes (or sandals). You just lost all the men in your family. In her culture, when a woman’s husband died, she had no income, no security, and no home. Ruth’s options were to either move back home with her parents or stay with her penniless mother-in-law, Naomi, who was going to an unknown land with an unplanned plan.

Ruth counted the cost and decided to do the unexpected. Ruth clung to Naomi (Ruth 1:14-16). Against all odds, Ruth abandoned what made sense, sacrificed quite a lot, and made a covenant with God and Naomi that she would stay (Ruth 1:17). One of the words the Bible uses to describe God’s love is hesed. It means that God’s love is faithful and covenantal.

Sticking with a hard friendship can feel one-sided, draining, time-consuming, or emotionally exhausting. Sometimes, God calls us to stick it out and faithfully pursue a friendship even when it doesn’t make sense. Why? Because friendship isn’t just about us. It’s not about what we can gain or how others can fulfill our needs. If God calls us to remain in that friendship, we must remember God is with us, and we are fighting together. The hardships and sacrifices will all be worth it to become the person God is shaping us into: someone who looks more like Jesus. We can demonstrate God’s faithful and covenantal love (His hesed) to others by making a sacrifice, just like Jesus did for us.

If you are exhausted from giving 110% to a friendship that feels too costly, remember what it cost Jesus to have friendship with us.

Questions

• Name a few things you have had to sacrifice in a friendship. How did you handle it?
• How does the faithful, covenantal love of God inspire you to be a better friend?
• Think of one person you can call, text, or hang out in person with this week. How does taking the first step to initiate show the faithful, constant love of God?

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This plan was adapted from Hey Friend: 31 Journaling Devotion on Friendships. Click here to learn more or purchase your copy.