Broken Vows: Healing From Spousal BetrayalSýnishorn

The Aftershock of Betrayal

Earthquakes can devastate whole cities with their sudden and violent force. If severe enough, a single earthquake can propel objects into the air and cause critical damage to homes, buildings, and other infrastructure. Imagine what it would be like to experience one of these firsthand.

Now, imagine this: after enduring one earthquake, another quake shakes the ground around you, further destabilizing you and your surroundings. You would be experiencing something called an aftershock. These aftershocks come as secondary seismic events—the effect of displaced earth adjusting to the effects of the first earthquake’s shock.

If you’ve ever experienced spousal betrayal or read studies on trauma and the effects of betrayal, then you can see a connection between betrayal and the scenario imagined above. Like an earthquake, the revelation of a spouse’s lies or infidelity can come suddenly and violently, leaving unimaginable damage in its wake. The aftershocks that follow are the shifts in thoughts, emotions, and relationships betrayed spouses have to navigate as they begin to absorb the effects of the betrayal. For many, these aftershocks bring about feelings of rejection, devastation, humiliation, shame, anger, isolation, and more. Betrayed spouses feel out of control and powerless, unsure what to do now that they’ve been so severely let down by someone they trust.

Can you relate? Has your world been shaken by the revelation of your spouse’s betrayal or infidelity? Are you reeling from the aftershocks, wondering what to do, how to feel, and how to heal from this awful pain? This devotional is for you. You don’t have to walk through this alone. In fact, you shouldn’t walk through this alone. You are more vulnerable now than ever, and the devil, your enemy, wants nothing more than to tempt you toward hiding and isolation. Being the lionlike predator that he is, he knows prey is easiest to pursue when it is alone. Remember, God promises never to leave or forsake you. He promises to be near the brokenhearted. Keep promises like these close to your heart and surround yourself with a support system. There is power in community and in realizing you are not alone.

Betrayal is not the end of your story. Healing is possible and available to you. It all starts with one step. Let that step be toward God and community. You are not alone.

Thought of the Day: I am seen and known by a God who loves me. I can trust Him with everything that’s broken in my life right now. I can also seek the prayers and support of people I trust who will continue to point me to the truth of God’s love.