Unequally Yoked In Marriage: Challenges And OpportunitiesSýnishorn

MARRIAGE IS NOT AN EXCLUSIVELY "CHRISTIAN INSTITUTION"

There’s no doubt about it. “Spiritually mixed” relationships are a common feature of the contemporary marital landscape. If you’re a Christian and if marriage to an unbeliever is part of your day-to-day experience, you know that this is a serious issue deserving careful and prayerful attention.

So significant are the rifts in thinking between biblically and non-biblically minded people that some folks assume it simply isn’t possible for the spiritually mismatched to come together in a “one-flesh” relationship. In their opinion, the only “true” marriage is one in which both partners are solidly committed to the lordship of Jesus Christ. But while this perspective is reflective of genuine concerns about real and valid issues, it isn’t necessarily the final word on the subject. If we’re to understand, grapple with, and resolve some of the challenges faced by “spiritually mixed” couples, we’re going to have to begin by recognizing that, according to Scripture, marriage is not just a “Christian institution.”

The fact of the matter is that marriage was created by God for the good of all mankind, regardless of the participants’ spiritual commitments. Marriage, like the sunshine and the rain that fall upon “the just and the unjust alike” (Matthew 5:45), is, according to most theologians, part of the “common grace” that God has poured out on mankind for the good of the race as a whole. It may be true that it is only “in Christ” that marriage can reach its full potential. Nevertheless, it is still beneficial for non-believers in many ways.

This suggests that while it’s highly advisable for a Christian to marry another Christian, both partners don’t necessarily have to know Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord in order to benefit from the blessings of marriage and family. That’s because marriage, as a fundamental element of God’s plan for the entire human race, is built upon timeless, unchanging, and universal principles. These principles are not “respecters of persons.” They were established in the beginning by the Creator, and they remain relevant and applicable to people of every description, believers and non-believers alike.

That’s not the whole story, of course. Once we’ve taken the discussion this far, it’s important to step back and look at the question of marriage in terms of the “bigger picture.” Any genuine believer knows that the Christian faith concerns itself with eternal spiritual realities and deep questions about the ultimate meaning of life. When we look at the world from this perspective, we have to admit that, in the final analysis, nothing really makes any difference or matters much if you don’t know the Lord. “He who has the Son has life,” writes the apostle John; “he who does not have the Son of God does not have life” (1 John 5:12). That’s the Christian message in a nutshell, and it applies to marriage as much as any other area of life.

We can sum all this up by saying that marriage is a good thing for men and women of all faiths and persuasions, but that this good thing can become something even better when both partners share the same understanding of its design and the same unswerving commitment to its Designer.