Following Jesus When You DoubtSýnishorn

Devotion

When Jesus appeared to the disciples on the boat, he was walking on water. Initially, this terrified the disciples: “‘It’s a ghost,’ they said, and cried out in fear” (Matthew 14:26).

A belief in ghosts or spirits was common in antiquity. So it’s little surprise that when the disciples saw someone doing something that humans can’t do—like walk on water—they were convinced an apparition was walking toward them. It was only after Jesus spoke that the disciples knew it was him (see verse 27). Even then, they were uncertain, so Peter asked for proof: “Lord, if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water” (verse 28).

It’s easy to scoff at the disciples. How could they not have known it was Jesus? But how often have we missed Christ in our midst, especially when we’re distracted by the storm around us? Jesus doesn’t always show up the way that we think he will. He doesn’t always show up when we think he will (remember the disciples had been battling the storm for hours before Jesus appeared). And he doesn’t always look the way we think he will look. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t come. It just means we have to be looking for him.

This is hard to do when we’re anxious, stressed, or afraid of whatever the storm we’re facing has brought into our lives. We’re distracted by the fear and anxiety and fixated on what’s going wrong. Even if Jesus is showing up, it’s easy to miss him. But Jesus is the key to getting through the storm. If we lose sight of him or fail to trust in him, our storms will be that much more intense. But if we’re aware of him and trust he is with us even as the waves rage , we can weather any storm. His presence brings us peace. His voice brings us hope.

Reflect

1.When Jesus was crucified, his followers were devastated. Their Savior was gone. They had seen him die. They had buried him. They were certain of his death. They had lost all hope. But then, as we see in this passage, Jesus revealed himself to Mary. She had known him during his ministry. She was in the throes of grief after he died—a storm that many of us know all too well. Why do you think Mary didn’t recognize Jesus at first?

2.Mary not only failed to recognized Jesus but also mistook him for the gardener who kept up the tombs. At what point did Mary recognize Jesus?

3.In the midst of Mary’s sorry, she heard Jesus’ voice . . . and recognized it was him. Has it ever taken you a while to realize Jesus was with you in a storm or at another point in your life? What allowed you to finally recognize Jesus’ presence with you?

4.What would it be like to hear Jesus speak your name in the midst of whatever storm you are facing? How would it change the way you feel about your storm?

Pray

The Jesuit Prayer of Examen is a daily practice in which you are invited to examine the events of your day, give thanks, and note where you encountered God. For your prayer time today, go through these five steps of the prayer to help you notice where God met you today: (1) put yourself in God’s presence; (2) pray for grace to see how God is working in your life; (3) go over events, conversations, and moments that stick out to you; (4) reflect on these events, conversations, and moments; and (5) ask God to help you be aware of his presence tomorrow.