The 7 ResolutionsSýnishorn

Choose Friends

Having friends is a fundamental element of ordinary life; choosing the right friends is an essential factor for an abundant life. The friends you choose directly impact the choices you make in life. The people closest to us can help, or hurt, our self-control. Even our morality hangs in the balance depending on the friends we choose. “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals’” (1 Cor. 15:33).

Fools bring you down, and friends call you forward. The need to distinguish between them is the difference between life and death. Proverbs 27:6 gives us a vivid truth about discerning between enemies or fools and friends. “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” Some people present themselves as friends, but they are enemies in friends’ clothing. How can you tell the difference?

Enemies / Fools: Are critical, will betray you, are prideful, want to tear you down to make themselves look better, and will suck-up to you and manipulate you just to get what they want.

Friends: Are hopeful, will respect what you tell them in confidence, demonstrate humility, seek to build you up, but are also willing to tell you the truth even when it might be hard for you to hear.

When someone shows you who they are, believe it. God loves fools, but He doesn’t expect you to make them your friends. Pray for them, but don’t partner with them.

There is another level of friendship that is described in Scripture. These friends are what I call next-level friends. They not only lift you up but also call you forward. Having one or two of these in a lifetime is a true gift from God (Proverbs 18:24). Many things can pull people together. Hobbies, habits, politics, cuisine, culture, and shared dreams. But the one thing that puts steel in the cement of friendship is God. Ask Him to bring friends into your life who will call you forward into His will for you.

THE ROAD TO BETTER FRIENDSHIPS

• Take an inventory of the people you spend the most time with. Are they friends (or potential friends), or are they fools?
• Pray and ask God to help you discern the difference.
• If there is someone you’re feeling convicted to separate from, ask God to give you the courage to do that.
• Is there someone in your life who could potentially be a “next-level friend”? Be bold and ask them if they would like to take your friendship even deeper.