How To Adopt Without Ruining Your FamilySýnishorn
Tip #7 - Theology Matters
God is sovereign.
We find it across the writ of Scripture, but pointedly at the end of Job, where he speaks about his understanding of God’s ability to know all things. He states plainly his belief that God can do anything He desires.
King Nebuchadnezzar confesses a similar sentiment, only taking a different route. God moves this impious and iniquitous king into the wilderness, causes him to become like one of the animals–then restores him to his place. After his unique experience we find this king testifying about a God who does whatever He wills.
What makes sense to Him doesn’t have to make sense to me.
For example, He owes me no explanation for why he would ask a dear family to travel halfway around the world to adopt a child only for the child to die in a matter of weeks. He does not need to defend His reasoning for asking a family to bring a child into the home– who wreaks utter havoc upon it. His reasons need not make sense for why He asks you to bring into your perfectly normal home a child with difficulty and illness–and all sorts of unknowns…
When I was posed with the possibility to take on the challenge, my honest response was, “Lord, I’m sorry. I’m not willing.”
Before we entered what was to become a very long and difficult season of our lives, I sat alone in my unwillingness, unmoved by the need or the enthusiasm of my spouse. However, my curiosity got the better of me. Well, if we did this crazy thing (which I’m not willing to do), I wondered what would we name this child. It so happened the first and only name we liked was the name before me. And now, I wondered what that name meant, and quickly looked it up on my computer:
Jolee – a Hebrew derivative of God is willing.
I wasn’t willing. But God is.
Theology matters.
How do we accept God’s ways as higher than our ways when we offer everything we have and are, and it’s not turning out like we planned?
- We cling to character and His Word, like Psalm 121:1-2.
- And just like the Psalmist--who reminds God of His history, in case He has forgotten (Ps. 22:4-5), you declare to Him that you are counting on Him to be consistent!
About this Plan
If you’re thinking about adoption, one of the greatest fears is not knowing how it will impact your family. For those already participating, learning to navigate the dynamics adoption adds without your family imploding remains on the mental front burner. Having two biological and six adopted children, I understand. You can navigate adoption without ruining your family. The endeavor can be priceless. Here are my top ten strategies for success.
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