Paper WallsSýnishorn

The Way Through

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I want to see me the way you see me. Help me be who you created me to be—for the sake of others!

Reading

There are two kinds of people in the world: people who make a difference and people who make excuses.

Which kind of person do you want to be? A person who makes the world a better place? Or a person who lives behind their paper walls?

Most excuses are based on fear. Fear often stems from an experience we’ve had and don’t want to be repeated. These experiences can create a fear of failure, rejection, or abandonment. Most of the time we don’t know where this fear comes from. Something just triggers our “because” narrative. We have reasons for what we do or don’t do.

So, off we go, and we don’t grow. We get stuck. Excuses make us small, selfish, and unavailable relationally. Excuses cause you to miss out. And the world misses out on you—the you God created you to be.

Paul said in his letter to early Christians in Ephesus,

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10)

If you’re a Jesus follower, God has a plan for you that goes beyond you—“to do good works.” This isn’t about being good for goodness’s sake or for your sake. It’s about being good for the sake of others.

But what if you’re missing out on God’s purpose for your life because you’re hiding out and hanging back? What if you’re opting out of who God created you to be? And what God created you to do?

Excuses are a subtle way of refusing to take responsibility for your life.

For Jesus followers, excuses can become a subtle way of resisting the will of God for our lives.

How can we begin to break through our paper walls?

Here are five not-so-easy steps to begin the process of getting rid of what’s holding you back. If you’re serious about them, these steps have the potential to change your faith, your life, and your relationships.

Step 1: IDENTIFY your excuses.

You can’t abandon an excuse you haven’t identified. The best way to identify excuses is to listen to your “becauses.”

I can’t because… I quit going to church because… We’re not on speaking terms because…

When you catch yourself becausing, write it down, even if it doesn’t make sense in the moment.

Step 2: INTERROGATE your excuses.

Interrogate your becauses. Ask, Why?

Why do I immediately opt for that particular “because”?

Why do I make excuses whenever that topic, question, person, relationship, or part of my past comes up? Why do I immediately go back to “because”?

What am I afraid of?

Am I just being lazy? Selfish? Insecure?

Don’t move ahead until you have answers. Your responses to your becauses will clarify whether there’s an actual reason (a brick wall) or a made-up excuse (a paper wall).

If you identify and answer the why behind an excuse, an excuse’s power is reduced. When you bring an excuse into the light, it gets lighter. It gets smaller, sillier, and easier to leave behind.

Step 3: RELABEL your “reasons.”

Say it out loud: “That’s not a reason; that’s an excuse!” It’s a paper wall you’ve built. Now, say this out loud: “If I built it, I can tear it down!”

You’re not a prisoner of your past, your failures, or your fears. You’ve been created by God, and you have stuff to do. You have a life to live and a world to improve. Now, you’re on your way! You’ve cut ties with the lies.

The truth has begun to set you free. You’re free to see, to love, to do, and to be fully who God created you to be.

Step 4: ANSWER the question: What do I lose if I continue to excuse?

List the consequences. What do you give up? Who do you give up? What do you miss out on? Who do you miss out on? Who misses out on you?

What is this one excuse costing you?

Write this down and you’ll discover: The price is too high!

You don’t want to get to the end of your life and look back with regret. Regret says, I should have and I could have, but I didn’t.

Step 5: TELL somebody.

Come clean with your excuses.

Just think, if everybody decided to come clean with their excuses, what would happen in our relationships. In our families. In our world.

What if you took these five steps to heart? What if you decided you would no longer hide behind paper walls? After all, there are two kinds of people in the world:

There are people who are not you.

There is someone who is you.

And only you can do what God has created you to do. You don’t want to miss that. Leave your excuses behind. Invite the light of the world to light up your life.

Be done with paper walls. Life is too short. The world is too broken. And God is too great.

Reflection

Are you willing to work through the five steps? What do you think will happen if you don’t? What do you think will happen if you do?