A Field Guide to Biblical Community Sýnishorn

My five-year-old stood by the sofa, forming a plan. He was about to embark on a task he could not complete: lifting the sofa to retrieve his lost toy. I realized what he was doing and asked if he needed help. He looked at me—with far more confidence in himself than ability—and said firmly, “I can do it myself.” Then he squatted down, grasped the sofa, and lifted it with all his might. The sofa didn’t even think about budging. He lifted again, tried new positions, and grunted under his strain, determined to succeed. But sure enough, after a minute, he turned to me and asked (like it was a new idea; as if I had not offered my services sixty seconds earlier), “Daddy, can you help me?” With an amused chuckle, of course, I did.

At that moment (and many others Jess and I have with our kids—every parent knows this exchange), my son reflected a tendency in every human: I can do it myself. Especially in our individualized culture, our mindset feels like this: “To accomplish what I want to— or at least, what I think is expected of me—I have to work hard. I have to study to make the grade. I have to be appropriately involved in activities I’m good at. I have to ‘pull myself up by my bootstraps’ and make my own success. Assuming I do, I gain the lifestyle I want, and I can amass resources I’ve earned to use as I wish.”

The problem? Even outside of our overtly spiritual pursuits, we cannot do it ourselves. Individually ranked students had a community of teachers, administrators, peers, and family support that shaped their multi-year education. In organizations with multiple employees, the roles, relationships, and duties impact one another’s performance. Keeping our homes means relying on a community of experts to repair things we cannot and neighbors from whom we borrow a mower, and so forth. In this, we note the fallacy of our worldview. In school, work, home, and lives, we must look to others and ask, “Can you help me?”

Today’s verses in Colossians remind us that the Christian life is a life of togetherness. In relationships, we grow in Christ and see spiritual fruit in our lives. We cannot do it ourselves!

Consider your point of view:

1) in your life, where are you more prone toward individualism, and where are you more apt to admit your need for others? What makes the difference?

2) Why is God’s call to life together hard to live out?