Living Changed: In MarriageSýnishorn

The Triangle

Marriage is a beautifully designed gift from God. It’s the closest example we have on Earth of God’s love for us. When we love our spouse as God intended, marriage is selfless, generous, compassionate, and committed.

Marriage is more than a document filed at the courthouse or vows made in front of loved ones. It’s a covenant. It is a binding agreement made between husband and wife, and God. It is a three-way promise, and when we make God part of our marriage, we are better at loving each other.

Think of a triangle with God at the top and husband and wife representing the other two points. As the man and woman move closer to God, they also get closer to each other. Similarly, the more faithful they are to God, the more faithful they will be to each other. The more devoted they are to God, the more devoted they will be to their marriage.

If the key to a strong marriage is a strong relationship with God, then the best thing we can do to love our spouse well is to spend intentional time becoming more like Jesus. Despite what romantic comedies would have us believe, no person can complete us. Only God can do that.

Dr. Les and Leslie Parrott, authors of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, say it this way: “If you try to find intimacy with another person before achieving a sense of wholeness on your own, all your relationships become an attempt to complete yourself.”

If you want a strong marriage, focus on improving yourself. Work on forgiveness and healing, so your past hurts don’t affect your current relationship. Learn to fight the lies of the enemy, and take your thoughts captive so you can live every day with confidence in Christ. Believe that God created every part of you on purpose so that you can do what He created you to do. Don’t focus on trying to fix your spouse because it’s the transformation in you that will change your marriage.