Grieve With HopeSýnishorn

TEARS ARE NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS

As servicemen and women, we are often sucked into the false belief that tears are a sign of weakness. Let’s see what the Bible says about weeping.

JOB’S STORY

Job was a wealthy man with a large family. In an instant, he lost everything: his children, his cattle, his wealth, his health. When three of Job’s friends heard what happened to him, they got together and went to comfort him (Job 2:11).

They sat in silence with him for a week before speaking. When Job broke the silence and expressed his pain, his friends were quick to point out his lack of faith (Job 4:3–6). They said his suffering was due to his sins and the sins of his children (Job 4:7–8).

Although Job claimed he had not sinned, they were sure that if he were innocent, God would not have let this happen (Job 8:6–8; 11:2–4; 22:21–30). They accused him over and over to try to get him to confess.

Finally, Job said, “Miserable comforters are you all!” (Job 16:2, NIV). Rather than comforting Job, they increased his pain.

Using Job’s story as an example, sort the following items into two categories: Items that were helpful to Job in his grief, and items that were not helpful.

1. Someone who pushes you toward healing.
2. Someone who listens more than speaks.
3. A friend who rushes you to move on.
4. Talking to someone about how you feel.
5. Someone present with you.
6. Someone who assumes they understand your situation.
7. Someone who gives you hope.
8. A friend who prays with and for you.

Answers

1. Not Helpful
2. Helpful
3. Not Helpful
4. Helpful
5. Helpful
6. Not Helpful
7. Helpful
8. Helpful

Reflect & Respond

Optional Tip: Journaling your responses to the scripture and follow up questions can help you process what you're learning and see your progress towards healing over time.

What loss that you have experienced feels the most significant to you right now? At this moment, what stage of grief do you think you are in? What is one thing you would like to do to face this stage? Reflect on the hope that is found in Christ. All sorrow will be removed in the new heaven and earth and all will be made right.

DEATH AND LOSS CAME INTO THE WORLD

Because of this, we all suffer and grieve. But as Christians, we have hope because we know in heaven there will be no more pain, suffering, grieving, or mourning. Read the following verses that remind us of this hope.

I Thessalonians 4:13, Revelation 21:4, Nehemiah 1:3-4

WHAT’S NEXT

Grief helps us acknowledge, experience, and eventually accept the unfairness of this world while trusting in our Sustainer. And while grief may be postponed, it cannot be ignored indefinitely. Pain demands attention.

If you are on a journey toward new beginnings, you will want to continue and look for the next study in this Never Alone series called, “Bringing Pain to the Cross.”

For more information on healing from trauma, especially in the military, check out our website: NeverAloneMilitary.org